Ravenskya's Reviews

The Selfless Gene: Living with God and Darwin by Charles Foster

2011-08-03T16:51:00.001-04:00

Though this book can be rather tedious reading at times, it is an excellent affirmation for those who chose to believe in a higher power but still want to keep a logical view of science and the world around them. Those who believe in God but also believe in evolution. With a recent political polarizing of the Creationist and Evolutionist camps, people naturally feel the need to consider themselves one or the other. The reality is that the majority of people fall somewhere in the middle and are a bit confounded by it all.

Foster does a fairly good job of flashing the scientific facts that disprove young-earth creationism. True believers have never been hindered by facts so if you are one of them... this book is not for you. The majority of his facts are ones that I have previously read from textbooks or noted authors so I didn't bother to check on the ones that I hadn't already been aware of. He did bring up a few that I had never thought of and it gave me more to ponder.

Foster then turns his sites on the Neo-Darwin camp - the atheists who believe that there is no creator and that all things can be explained through evolution. He doesn't do as stellar of a job pointing out their errors, mainly hanging his hat on altruism and community and asking where in evolution did altruism come from. An interesting point, but not as strong as I would have liked to support and even lashing for each elitist extremist side.

Then he gets to his conclusion... it's an interesting idea to contemplate but it just seems that there should have been a stronger more palatable conclusion that marries in the middle of the ideas. People come to this book because they are in the middle and want to know how to reconcile their faith with their logic.

In all this was a good book and many thought provoking points are brought up. The reading is rather dry and it will be easy to put this book down though if you read it the ideas will stick with you and rattle around in your head for days.

Real People Don't Own Monkeys: And Other Stories of Pets, Their People and the Vets Who See It All by J. Veronika Kiklevich

2011-08-03T16:50:00.002-04:00

I was really looking forward to this book, being a Vet student and a voracious reader, I try to read as much as possible on my future profession. Compared to many of the other books written by vets that I have read, this one seems a bit less structured which gives an almost stream of conscious vibe to what you are reading. The problem with stream of conscious in this book is that there are many times when the author changes direction and you feel that some threads are left unfinished, some things don't seem to flow with a lot of logical sense, and many of the stories left me scratching my head wondering why the author elected to include them.

I guess I was hoping for more on the actual animals, or more actual reality in what I felt I was reading. I wasn't looking to hear about her calling an owner every night in the middle of the night and hanging up on them because they had woken her up once with a concern (granted it was probably drug induced) for their animal. Some of the book comes across as a bit snarky, some of it meaningful, but sadly very little of it really came across as heartfelt. There is an almost visible wall between the author and the reader, where it felt like she was trying to hard to be funny and never really delved into the truth. Perhaps the intent was to keep it light hearted, but when discussing vets who harm animals or blowing up a bird or microwaving a dead cat so the owner wouldn't know it had been thrown in the freezer... it all just felt hollow.

Don't get me wrong, I didn't hate this book, I just had hoped for so much more.

Some We Love, Some We Hate, Some We Eat by Hal Herzog

2011-08-03T16:47:00.001-04:00

This book is by no means a perfect book. Herzog is not a "great" writer... many chapters are clunky, some points are over drawn while others seem glossed over... many times I wished someone with a little more writing muscle had stepped in to help out.

But you have to read this book.

This is one of the most fascinating books I have read in a long time. The type of book that causes you to get up and do some of your own research on things. This book is not about animals really - many people will mistakenly pick this book up under those pretenses. This is a book about humans, and how they perceive and handle the complex relationships we have with animals. How do we deal with the fact that we don't want chickens used in cockfights, but then stop at KFC on the way home. How to we scream about the rights of lab mice but then put out kill traps in our own homes. The psychology is truly mind boggling. I especially enjoyed the sections on Hitler being one of the first leaders to enact animal rights... right before the creation of the concentration camps - if there was a more poignant example of human contradiction I don't know what it is.

The facts are interesting, the ideas will have your brain whirling - Hal doesn't really go into a lot of preaching he's more pointing out things for us to ponder over - a tactic I prefer to heavy handed information jamming. I LOVE this book and hope many others read it.

2 B R 0 2 B by Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

2011-08-03T16:43:00.001-04:00

I bought this for two reasons -
1) I love Vonnegut and
2) at that price even if I didn't like it, at least I didn't spend much.

Well you know what? It was still a ripoff. I spent 2 dollars and change for 17 pages of text... text that was available online for free, there are more blank pages in this book than there are pages with writing on them. I am highly disappointed.

As far as the short story itself... it's not one of his better works, it's about a world where there is no more death or aging and the effect that has on people. It's very short and belonged in a larger collection rather than a few folded in half pieces of paper labeled a "book."

How to Survive a Garden Gnome Attack by Chuck Sambuchino

2011-08-03T16:41:00.001-04:00

Unless you are buying this for a garden gnome enthusiast, I would have to say that this is a leave it sort of book. I had hoped for something funny, or some dry wit... but when reading this cover to cover - it comes across very bland, like a college creative writing assignment that was churned out over too much coffee and just enough bong hits that the author thought it was funny. In the end the funniest part was the pictures. I didn't laugh at all, though I could see where it was Supposed to be funny... it just wasn't. Perhaps it's part of the "You can't spoof a spoof" problem that happens. It just comes out not funny. I'm sorry, I wanted to like this, but I can't think of anyone that I would honestly recommend this to.

I don't want to go into a lot of detail because I don't want to come across as author bashing, but let me simply say, the idea was good, the pictures were good, but the execution of the idea falls flat.

Boom! by Mark Haddon

2011-08-03T16:37:00.000-04:00

This is an adorably funny book, that builds to laugh out loud funny by the end. Jim and Charlie, two best friends are concerned with the possibility that Jim will be expelled from school. They decide that the best course of action is to bug the teacher's meeting to see if they are planning to expel Jim. What they hear instead is a conversation in a strange language by teachers who don't know each other - a mystery is afoot! Soon they are searching for clues worried that their teachers are spies. But the truth is much stranger.

This book is good for the 9 and up age groups provided they are strong readers. I gave it to my 8 (almost 9) year old who was able to read and understand most of it, only asking about the British slang. I think the greatest enjoyment will be around the 12 year old age group.

This book contains creepy teachers, men in black, laser weapons, nasty older sisters and their even nastier boyfriends, perplexing parents, and well I wont spoil it for you. For a fun filled trip into the scifi realm, give this book a try, it's well worth the read.

And yes - there was one part of this book that actually triggered a verbal giggle from me.

Mirrormask - Neil Gaiman

2009-04-24T00:11:00.000-04:00

I love Gaiman's works, Corilane was one of my favorite children's books. I had high hopes for Mirrormask, we own the movie, and though it's a bit dark for the younger children, it's still a very creative and visually stunning film.

After reading the book I'm glad that the movie was visually stunning. For some reason the book does not flow, or hold together well. Had I not seen the movie I would be completely lost in attempting to follow this book. The concept of standing on the books to cross the gorge, or the giants locked together, or the darkness and what it is doing - is all lost. Now you can say that it was for the simplicity of making it a children's book - but I don't buy it. The concepts involve possible death, a brain tumor, and an evil girl willing to sacrifice the entire world she lives in to try something new (not our main character - the bad guy).

The book follows a young girl who has grown up in a circus, she want's to live a normal life and gets in a argument with her mother about it. Her mother then collapses and is hospitalized with a brain tumor. Feeling quilty, Helena withdraws into a world of her strange artwork. That night she wakes up to find herself drawn into a world of her own creation - someone has stolen the mirrormask and traded places with her. Now she has to travel through a strange and hostile world ruled by a Queen of Light and a Queen of Darkness, to find the only way home - the stolen mirrormask.

The artwork was good and the concept is great - but to read it without having seen the movie will leave the reader a bit perplexed. If reading to children, go with one of Gaiman's other works before this one.

Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck

2009-04-23T22:27:00.001-04:00

I have hated Steinbeck since the tender age of 15 when I was forced to choke down Grapes of Wrath. I was then forced to sit through the movie version of Grapes of Wrath, and was re-assigned to book to read by a crazy teacher I had at the age of 17. I liked it no better on the second go round, however at least by then I was able to pick out the "Christ Figure" that my teachers had always babbled about.

Because of this terrible set of experiences I had sworn off of Steinbeck for the rest of my life. If you see a copy of Grapes of Wrath on fire, you know that I'm probably near by. So when I started reading the list "1001 books to read before you die" I was glad that I could already check off Grapes of Wrath and not touch it again - but to my dismay, there were other books by Steinbeck on the list. I admit I panicked... there was no WAY I was going to torture myself like that again. Every word of that last attempt had been a struggle.

Then I noticed that one of the books was "Of Mice and Men." I had seen the play several times and the movie, and to be honest - they weren't that bad. So during a car ride to ATL under questionable circumstances, I read this 107 page book from beginning to end.

Now I'm sure there was a Christ figure in there somewhere, and I know that there was a lot of "deep meaning" and "symbolism enough to choke a badger" but I happily ignored all of it. I am excited to say that I read through the book - found it didn't change me, my thought process, or my lifestyle, and was able to move on.

Short Summary - George and his retarded pal Lenny are day workers who travel from farm to farm trying to earn a living. Lenny is huge, with the mind of a child, and George is small and quick witted. George keeps Lenny entertained with stories about how one day they will of their own land and work it themselves. George has told the story enough that even he's starting to believe it. Things go bad at their current job when a trampy woman hits on Lenny. That's about it.

Lots of themes, racism, tragedy, the way men treat one another, the lifestyle of the migrant worker in the 30's, the treatment of the mentally handicapped, etc. In the end, Steinbeck does a better job of not bashing the reader over the skull with his themes, and he managed to contain his desire to describe every grain of sand. I figure most people can make it through 107 pages of Steinbeck.

The Illiad - Homer

2009-04-23T22:19:00.001-04:00

I'll be honest by stating that I have no idea which version I read - I read this online and it was translated into prose rather than verse.

Homer's Epic tale of the fall of the Trojans is more about the warrior Achilles and his battle within himself. True the tale begins with the great insult and ends with the funeral of Hector, but the story really revolves around Achilles.

Even through it was translated into English, I can't help but feel that there was something lost - perhaps it is the shifting from verse to prose, whatever it may be, there is a feeling of distance the reader has from the story. The tale itself is brilliant, brutal, heartbreaking, and epic, but the words in the version I read really didn't grab and pull me in as I had hoped. I spent much of the time I was reading this struggling to keep going. Specifically when the gods began their bickering.

I was also confused in this translation in that the God's names were changed to the Roman names rather than the Greek ones (I do own a copy of this in Verse and I recall the names being in Greek - I just hate reading verse so I thought I'd try it in prose first). I had to pull up a wiki to get the Roman to Greek name translations for some of the lesser known gods.

I have to admit that after watching and loving the movie Troy (which is based off of the Illiad) I was disappointed that Hector was less likable in the original tale then he was in the movie. Also Paris was only briefly mentioned.

I would recommend that everyone read at least some version of this story - it's such an incredible tale. Just make sure you check out the translation before buying it.

Maybe Yes, Maybe No, Maybe Maybe - Susan Patron

2009-04-23T22:16:00.001-04:00

Life as the middle sister can be tough, especially when your big sister is pretty and very very smart. It's even tougher when your Mom is a waitress and you have to teach everything you know to your little sister - even the things you don't know.

PK is the middle sister, between Megan and Rabbit. Even though Megan is now "almost-a-teenager" and Rabbit is starting Kindergarten, everything seems to be going fine - until their Mom decides that they need to move into a bigger apartment. Suddenly everything PK knows and relies on is going to be left behind. The Big Blue Chair that they loved as if it were a family pet is too big to fit into the new apartment with the new sleeper sofa, and the built in hamper where all of PK's magical stories come from - can't come with them either. How can a new wicker basket hold all of the stories? It's full of holes and all the stories would fall out!

"Maybe Yes, Maybe No, Maybe Maybe" is a sweet story about three little girls having to move and make what they consider a major life change. Told through the eyes of PK, we see how the girls learn not only to accept change, but also to learn how each of them is special in their own way. Though the voice of the story is young and the tale is geared toward 9-11 year olds, there are some large words that may require a lot of sounding out and some parental help defining. I don't know of many young children who know what "repast" is. Even though they may have some difficulty with some of the words, I believe that most children will be able to identify with the characters and enjoy the book. This book will appeal mainly to girls, though if they are able to look past the three sisters as the main characters, boys may enjoy it as well since PK is a bit of a tomboy.

There is some talk of hormones and mention of a uterus as a female body part and it's having to do with "becoming a woman" - though it is not fully explained. If you are against your child reading about that then you have been warned. There is nothing explicit nor will your child come away with any additional knowledge on that topic, but it may illicit questions that you will want to have answers for before they get to that point.

This is a sweet book that many kids can identify with and will enjoy reading.

Maybe Yes, Maybe No, Maybe Maybe - Susan Patron

2009-04-23T22:16:00.000-04:00

Glimpses of the Moon - Edith Wharton

2009-04-23T22:15:00.000-04:00

When reading Wharton you never have the safety net of knowing that things will end happily. In fact - most of her books are tragedies in the most profound sense of the word. This is the first of her books that I have read in which the focus is primarily on a romance. Now I'm not much of a romance reader so when I realized that this would be a romance novel, I was a bit concerned. Lucky for me there was nothing sappy about this book.

Suzy and Nick enjoy each other's company, however neither of them has a fortune of their own. They live their lives sponging off of their wealthy friends because they are considered "interesting" by the wealthy. Even though the two of them have not a penny between them, they decide to marry and use their honeymoon to sponge living in vacation houses off of all of their acquaintances. Since neither of them had previously considered marriage - they make a deal that neither of them will stand in the way of the other, should a better or wealthier prospect arise.

Suddenly, much to their dismay, not only do they discover interested prospects with mountains of riches - but they also have fallen in love with one another. Pride, stubbornness, miscommunication, and their unwillingness to admit to any of the above leads them in to a year long series of events that open their eyes to the reality of their hearts, minds and situation. The only way for them to afford the lifestyle to which they are accustomed is to split and remarry wealthy suitors. The only way for them to stay together in their love is to give it all up and live a life of poverty. With a Wharton novel you never know where the ending will take you, so it can easily be expected that things will not go as your standard romance novel would. The reader follows Nick and Suzy, hoping desperately for them to end up together, to find a way to make things work, and to grow beyond the materialism that off of society deems a necessary part of life. Will they give in to the materialistic pleasures of high society and throw off their chance at love? Or will they cast off societies burdens and live a life of true passionate love?

Silas Marner - George Elliot

2009-04-23T22:14:00.000-04:00

Strange that so many people complained about this book after having been forced to read it in High School. I had never heard of this particular Elliot book until I acquired the list of "1001 books to read before you die." I can see where the language in this book would be troublesome to many young students, particularly if they have little to no experience reading anything from the time, much less anything written in phonetic slang. But the theme should be universal.

Short Synopsis - we follow to individuals through the tale, the title character - Silas Marner, a weaver who has had a long run of bad luck in dealing with people who has then holed himself away from society and fills his days with weaving and counting his slowly growing stack of gold. The other is Godfry Cass, a wealthy son of a land owner who's poor in morals and scruples. Through a series of events triggered by Godfry and his brother, Silas is thrust into various situations of both grief and joy. Always Silas maintains his high moral standard and simple way of life and is thusly rewarded for it.

As is standard in the literature of the time - the good get what they deserve and the morally lacking get their just ends. The interesting part that Elliot weaves in to the tale is that the unfortunate events that happen to Silas, all end up leading him to true happiness. Now I don't want to give the story away as many others have, but I will say that once you get past the first third or so (where the reader will find themselves wondering if ANYTHING is ever going to happen) the book picks up and becomes very enjoyable.

The language may be tough for some, but once you get about 20-30 pages in, you shouldn't have much trouble reading it. If all else fails, read it out loud. On the whole this is a very enjoyable book, though not my favorite - the story is fun and happy and leaves the reader feeling rather warm and fuzzy.

Pain Killers - Jerry Stahl

2009-04-23T22:12:00.002-04:00

This is probably not a book that I would have selected on my own - having hated the movie "Permanent Midnight." In the end it was an enjoyable read - if not a bit preposterous.

The Good Guy - Manny Rupert: an Ex-cop, on again off again junkie with a bad liver, who married a woman he met after she killed her husband and he responded to the police call. He's down on his luck, and not doing himself much good - then a strange old Jewish man shows up in his house, beats him with a walker and hires him to go undercover in San Quentin

The Good Girl - Manny's ex-wife, soon to be ex-ex-wife he hopes, is a neurotic bulimic on again off again junkie/prostitute/opportunist. Her morality is questionable but somewhere under all that sex and junk - there's a heart of gold (at least we're told)

The Bad Guys - Oh there are so many of them, but to keep from giving too much away I'll only list our target, the 90 year old blond German man in San Quentin who swears that he's Dr. Joseph Mengele (Nazi Death Camp Doctor at Auschwitz).

So, crazy Jewish man with walker hires Rupert to go undercover as a drug councilor at San Quentin to determine if the crazy old German actually IS Mengele. Things go bad quickly as Rupert's ex-wife shows up with an Aryan Brotherhood leader who also happens to be Jewish. The people on Rupert's side might actually be more dangerous then the convicts.

The writing is verbally simplistic, a lot of people rant and rave about how grotesque this is - but as a horror fan, I've got to say - it's not that bad. Most of the disgusting parts are simply people recounting what Mengele had done - which IS gross, but it's not extremely explicit in that respect. There is a lot of sex, drugs, racial slurs, anti-government garbage, and a whole lot of the German guy arguing about the good he did in the death camps - like slaughtering babies to cure cancer... that part gets old fast.

To be honest, this isn't the best or worse book I've read. The characters are all fairly despicable in one way or another and the plot only holds together loosely. At times you will find yourself shaking your head trying to figure out just how you're supposed to buy all of what's being sold to you here. If you are looking for something comparable - try Tim Dorsey- ADHD writing, spastic plot, and a lot of material to make your average reader cringe.

The Saga of Beowulf - R. Scot Johns

2009-04-23T22:12:00.001-04:00

I have now had this book FOREVER! And finally made it through all 600+ pages. Did it take me this long because it was slow or boring? Not at all! It took me that long because it was simply too big to fit in my purse.

Beowulf has long been one of my favorite stories of all time. In eighth grade we had to read the original poem in old English. Even though the language made me want to cry, I still loved the story. I have read and re-read various translations, and stylizations of the tale over the years. There is nothing more thrilling to me then following Beowulf and his men as they face the beast Grendel, then have to do battle with the Sea Witch and finally at the end of his life, to do battle with the Dragon. But in this book there is so much more to the story, so many little gaps filled in, more back story and so much more life to it.

This book, though huge and daunting to look at - is FANTASTIC. If you have ever wanted to read Beowulf, but hated the idea of ancient English verse - THIS is the book you need to read. Honest to the source material, and simple to read and comprehend without a translation key. Even if you love the tale in verse, you should still pick up a copy of this book and re-read it, the story and the character are given a whole new life. Beowulf becomes what we imagined he was between the lines of the old poem.

I have one complaint - and it should give you an idea of how much I love this book - The cover does not do it justice. This book should at least have a faux-leather cover, an epic tale like this deserves better then the 1980's Dungeons and Dragons looking cover it currently has. I highly recommend this book to everyone!

Avery Dick Walks Small - George Larson/Avery Dick

2009-04-06T21:39:00.002-04:00

Often times it is fun to watch as an author progresses in their craft – but then again sometimes when you enjoy an author and go back to read one of their earlier works, you are glad they have come as far as they have. “Avery Dick Walks Small” is one of the first novels following our illustrious intelligence agent, and sadly it does not have the polish or punch that the later novel has. The writing style is good enough, with interesting characters – however the reader gets bogged down with bad puns and wordplay that moves the story nowhere. Readers of “Secret Agent” novels generally like suspense, action, and a quickly paced plot. In this particular novel the plot involves the kidnapping of two young women who just happen to be the daughters of some very high ranking political figures. This should play out as a very exciting save the girl type caper – however with the book only being 176 pages long, it is almost a crime in itself that very little happens until page 85. The book bogs down in its own wordplay and “setup.” When we finally get to the excitement, though it is well written, it is sparse and too little payoff for the amount of buildup. Perhaps it is simply the main character, who chooses to downplay the experience, but in the end the reader doesn’t get the excitement they so desperately crave – the tense nail biting shootouts, the extended chase scenes where someone with a baby buggy unwittingly walks out of an alley and allows the bad guy to get away so that the giant coup-de-gras ending can occur, the big showdown. Sadly that never happens and the reader is simply left with a novel of wordplay, unbelievable sexual situations, and a feeling that what they read was just a big inside joke that they will never be given the punch-line to.

As negative as all of this sounds – this is only the second novel by this author and he is progressing quickly in his craft. I would keep my eye on him as his follow up to this one “Dick Goes to the Bank” is a much stronger entry in the cannon.

Rated R for profanity and sex.

Dick Goes to the Bank - By Avery Dick/George Larson

2009-03-10T20:58:00.001-04:00

Avery Dick is a retired special agent who specializes in getting the bad guy and speaking in puns. He smokes, drinks and attempts to womanize... he speaks in bad puns and thinks in repetitive sentences. However he has a job to do, he has been enlisted by the World Bank to head off to Romania - land of vampires and witches - to determine the cause of a sudden epidemic that is killing the locals. Why does the World Bank care about a few Romanian peasants? Because they recently sent them a gift of grain and seed - and the superstitious peasants are blaming the bank for the sudden plague.

What starts out as fairly straight forward ends up a rather dangerous mission for Mr. Dick. Though he never seems overly concerned with his safety, and some of his decision making leaves a little to be desired. This is a short book, only 150 or so pages and can be read in a single sitting. On the whole it is well written, but it is written for a specific type of audience, though it is not laugh out loud funny, I imagine fans of "Ace Ventura" or "The Jerk" would enjoy this book. Not that the book is meant to be silly, it is sort of short attention span - light hearted with a dash of heroics thrown in for good measure. We don't spend a lot of time on description or intense action, the book is first person with Mr. Dick's mind speaking directly to the reader. If bad puns make you groan, steer clear... if you hate repetition - this in not the book for you, as the author ends each of the short chapters with a variation of the same line.

Final summary - read before giving this to the kiddies, as there is murder, profanity and some sexual innuendo. Those looking for a fast, straightforward read that won't take too much out of them or require a whole lot of effort - this is a great relaxing book to pick up. Only a few minor typos and a simple, but clean layout make this a fairly attractive book.

Eden by Tony Monchinski

2009-03-01T17:35:00.004-05:00

If you are looking for a down and dirty Zombie novel, then look no farther. Provided of course that you can wade your way through multiple typos. The author has created almost the stereotypical archetype of a zombie book. Masses of undead, survivors banding together, total government breakdown, slow zombies, fast zombies, loud zombies, good survivors and bad survivors - it's all here.

The timeline leaps back and forth starting from within the walls of Eden, a sanctuary from the undead back to prior to the outbreak, then through various scenes of the pandemonium that followed. Some may dislike this format, I personally didn't mind it. The characters are very real, human, and flawed. Some are tortured by the loss of loved ones, others must deal with what they had to do to survive. The zombies in this book are what many zombie lovers would consider "old school" mindless shambling hoards of the undead.

What is interesting is that even though there isn't a single aspect of this novel that has not been done or seen before, this book reads as an all new story. I would consider this a must have for your zombie library. When I previously referred to typos, and there are plenty of them they mainly involve a lack of spaces between words at times, and at other times the leaving off of the last letter of a word, example the word "took" turning into "too." If you don't mind that then I highly recommend this book to the 15+ zombie fans.

Rated R for gore, violence, language both profane and racist, no sex is shown but it is very strongly eluded to.

Crimson by Gord Rollo

2009-02-28T22:31:00.001-05:00

Gord Rollo's Second novel is in my humble oppinion, far superior to his first. Where Jigsaw Man was an interesting new take on the Mad Scientist tale, Crimson is much closer to the "small band of kids take on monster who lives in their small town" tale that so many horror writers eventually touch on. Stephen King's being the most notable IT then we have Dan Simmons with Summer of Night and even fellow Leisure Author Brian Keene with Ghoul.

Though Crimson starts out much as all of the others, we quickly take a different turn. The opening scene of this book is a real kick in the gut and will thrill the most avid of gore hounds. From there we travel to about 20 years later. The small farmhouse where our opening scene took place has sat abandoned for all of those years, quietly awaiting new blood to move in. When an unaware single mother and her young son move into the house, there is a stirring in the well out back. Soon four young friends end up playing at the house and discovering an ancient evil trapped away. The four boys fight for their lives as their worst nightmares come to pass.

Crimson follows these kids from the time they unleash the monster through their lives as it revisits them, bringing all new terrors with them each time it shows back up.

The writing in this book is very strong and the book is extremely interesting. I only had three minor annoyances that I was able to forget and still enjoy the book. The first being that there were too many characters who's name started with "D" I don't know why that bothered me, but for some reason it did. The second was that the characters age significantly from the beginnning of the book through the end, but they never seem to grow mentally to match their ages. And the third was that towards the end of the book there is a large bit of exposition that sort of explained everything that had been going on... I would have preferred for some of it to have been left to the imagination and other bits of it to have been figured out throughout the tale rather than having it all explained at once. Still that was not enough to keep me from really enjoying this read. I recommend it to anyone looking for a good fun scare.

Recommended reading ages - 15 and up depending on maturity

The Case of Charles Dexter Ward - HP Lovecraft

2009-02-19T13:29:00.001-05:00

Lovecraft is a special writer, capable of twisting the mind of the reader in ways that all of the visual horror we are forever shown in this day and age can never accomplish.

What WAS the thing at the bottom of the pit? What was it that the good Doctor saw? So many open questions to let our minds fill in the blanks with the things that horrify us above all else.

The Case of Charles Dexter Ward is Lovecraft's longest work (at least that I've encountered) and there is so much in the meager 120 or so pages that it's amazing. We follow the Doctor as he relates the tale of his patient Charles Dexter Ward and his supposed decent into madness. In doing so we learn of an ancient relative who may have gone beyond dabbling in the black arts. Though the case revolves around Mr. Ward... the true story is that of his ancient relative.

Lovecraft has a grasp of the language that is beyond beautiful. He is eloquent, descriptive, engaging and thought provoking without ever coming across as pompous or arrogant. His description is effective without being obnoxious (Unlike J Fenimore Cooper), his dialog is realistic and meaningful (not like Jane Austin)and his plot is engaging, grabbing the reader from beginning to end (unlike "The House of the Seven Gables"). Highly recommended for those who like either the writing style of the time, or simple horror fans.

The Sirens – William Meilke

2009-02-17T11:38:00.000-05:00

Poor cover art may turn many away from this book… a poor synopsis on the back will discourage many more. In fact, the synopsis on the back is completely irrelevant to the book – the phone call mentioned does occur… however it has no bearing on the actual story what so ever.

A true synopsis – After their previous case involving an amulet (which I assume is the first in the series) our PI, Derek Adams and his agoraphobic sidekick are hired for what should be a simple case. An old woman wants Derek to head north to a small town and retrieve her son so that he can attend his father’s funeral. What follows delves deeply into the ancient Norse mythology including sirens, Odin, Loki, a shape shifter and some not-so-friendly locals.

Although this is classified as horror, and it does contain a monster… this book is more of an irreverent supernatural crime thriller. If it weren’t for the heavy use of profanity, I would recommend this as a young adult novel. For adults, they may have a tough time buying into everything that occurs. However, even though it lacks gore and is really never frightening, it is a fun book. The characters do all have similar voices and there is very little physical description of the different characters. It would have been easier to keep them mentally separate if the author hadn’t suffered from a penchant for names starting with the letter “D” or if they had each been given a distinctive voice. The character who stands out the most is the elderly chain-smoking widow, and even she is a dichotomy in that her personality shifts as the story needs it to.

The plot itself is quite wild though the author does manage to keep a handle on it, keeping it as restrained as anything containing this much magic in modern day times can be. It is enough to keep your attention from beginning to end, and to be honest I’m still not entirely sure where the ending came from, but I’ll buy it.

If you are looking for a light read that never takes itself too seriously then this can be quite an enjoyable time. The gore is light, and there is sexual contact told in the past tense (and the men have the wounds to prove it). The book does contain heavy profanity from a specific character, adult subjects such as suicide, and gore. If this were a movie and they cut the profanity down this would be a heavy PG-13 rating.

Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austin

2009-02-12T13:47:00.001-05:00

This is a classic.
It deserves to be a classic.
That does not make it exciting.

Perhaps it was my mood while reading... or perhaps I've just read too many books from the time period in too short a span... but I had a difficult time digging into this one.

If I were doing a study on manners, protocol, and society from that time period, this book would be my reference guide. As far as a fun filled story... I struggled at times to keep going. The opening was rather boring, very little occured to draw the reader in other than some interesting conversation. Then in the middle, the intrigue just didn't intrigue me. I'd never seen the movie but I can spot a liar in both book and film pretty quickly... so all of the drama around poor Mr. Darcy was more irritating to me than anything else. I mean, the poor guy, he deserved way better than he ended up with.

I guess my difficulty with this book begins with the fact that I'm a non-romantic woman. I'm also incredibly self reliant and even though I've read tons of books from this time period... I still can't figure out what these people did with their lives to make a living, I assume it's just land ownership but none of them seems to contribute anything! So you take that and apply my opinion that each of the girls in this book needed a severe reality check and a firm slap out of their rose petal glasses and maybe I was just a big angsty while reading. The men were complete mysteries who you never really got to know other than through the perceptions of the sisters... and since they seemed so warped to me, the men were alien.

I just felt bad for Mr. Darcy. I really wanted him to run off and find a decent woman. True the book picks up a bit in the middle and then through the ending, where everyone rides off into the sunset on their white horses to their fairyland castles full of rainbows and unicorns and everyone lives happily ever after and they all eat marshmellow fluff and candy corn for every meal

Soultaker - Bryan Smith

2009-02-12T10:20:00.000-05:00

This is the second book by this author that I have read, and I have to admit… that he really doesn’t draw me in. Sure the writing was fine, there is sex, violence and little green scaly critters romping about… but I have the hardest time investing myself emotionally in his books.

So we’re in a small town, and some goth girl turns out to be Lamia, an ancient half snake deity who needs a jump start of souls… so she’s possessed the women of a small town and turned them into psycho witch-like priestess hoes. So we’ve got a pack of male teens and an older brother who are trying to stop it all.

I had a hard time determining whether or not our author is deeply terrified of women… the women in this book are evil, corrupt, vengeful, lustful and extremely dangerous to the men… except of course for the lesbian. There are some really strange psychological ideas you could take from the author.

I did like the idea of his use of one of the more rarely mentioned mythological monsters rather than simply going with the standard vampire/werewolf/alien/zombie fare. I really wish I had been able to get into this book more. As it was, I had a hard time keeping my mind on it and struggled to get to the end. I’m not sure why either… the writing was fine, the concept was fine… perhaps it was the characters, I didn’t really care for any of them… and we never really had the opportunity to know any of the women prior to their possession so we couldn’t really regret their transformation. The men were just SO weak that they were hard to root for, granted we wanted someone to stop what was happening… but it’s hard to root for a bunch of guys who think like pervs.

Moral of the story: men – Keep it in your pants

Not a book! The Kindle 2 is coming out

2009-02-10T09:16:00.002-05:00

Ladies and Gentlemen - the new Kindle has been announce, and I have to admit, it's much spiffier looking than the last one. Since I don't own either - I can't make a real comparison. But I'm told that if you really enjoy reading new or self published authors that this thing is the way to go. Be sure to check it out, even if it's way out of your price range - you can add it to your amazon.com wishlist like me and dream.

Traumatized by Alexander S. Brown

2009-02-01T21:55:00.001-05:00

Traumatized is a short story book containing 15 tales of horror, and nothing else. The reader is saved from reading an introduction, any sales pitch for additional books, or even author information. The tales contained within the book range from thrillingly creepy and horrific to mediocre. There are stories of serial killers, demons, vengeful spirits, psychotic cults, voodoo curses, and even a bigfoot creature. Where Brown really shines is in his haunted house stories. The opening tale – “Bloodlines” is one of the two strongest in the book. A tale of four people called for a “treasure hunt” in a mysterious house learn that there is far more to the treasure than what they bargained for. Tied for my favorite is the story “It’s all True” another haunted house tale that ends is a terrifying and gruesome way. Brown is in his element when writing about haunted houses. I found his murderer tales to be the weakest in the book, specifically “April” which seems to have been written long before the author really hit his writing stride. It comes across as forced and stilted with problematic dialogue and unbelievable characters. The final tale in the book “Zoe’s Swan Song” is both gruesome and familiar, one knows how the tale of someone offering to show a vindictive person their “inner beauty” will turn out. Other than the haunted house tales, “The God Complex” was very interesting.

On the whole this was a collection of horror stories that is well worth the purchase. The percentage of excellent versus weak stories is in the reader’s favor with there being far more good than not. Any collection will have stories that are stronger than others. This is an excellent short story collection that I recommend to horror fans.

Rating is defiantly an “R” with profanity, gore, sex, rape and murder.

Original Review for Monsterlibrarian.com

The Chair - Graphic Novel

2009-02-01T20:34:00.001-05:00

I'll admit that I own no graphic novels other than the spawn compilations, so when they sent me a copy of "The Chair" to review, I was rather excited. The cover is well drawn, although the printing on my copy seems to be shifted to the left, cutting the last letter of each of the authors/illustrators names half off. A quick flip through reveals that the entire book is in black and white, nice touch.

Now our story follows a man on death row, surrounded by the criminally insane of the worst types, awaiting his final trip down the hallway. Quickly we determine that the prison is not all that it seems, the body count is too high with out anyone making a trip to the room containing the chair. Reality twists and churns as our perceptions of what is really happening bubbles in the foam.

The concept of this novel is excellent... unfortunately the execution leaves something to be desired. The background artwork is fantastic, unfortunately the artwork of the people in the story is weak, they are improperly proportioned and sadly all look too similar to distinguish anyone other than our main character... and that's only because he has a beard and is almost always sitting. Another negative is the Dialogue, which is cryptic and bland. Sure the reader gets the gist of what is going on, but having more fluid and specific dialogue would have greatly added to the reader's enjoyment. Though this is not the worst graphic novel I have read, it certainly does not rank among the best.

Kiddie rating for this book is PG 13 possibly R for profanity, violence and adult subject matter along the lines of child murder/rape/serial killers.

Originally reviewed for www.monsterlibrarian.com

Coraline - Neil Gaiman

2009-01-26T20:14:00.000-05:00

I had ordered this book long ago when on a whim I was determined to get all of Gaiman's books. I noticed that it was a childrens book so I mentally filed it away. When I saw the advertisements for the movie... I knew that with a 7 year old I would have to watch the film and ripped the book off the shelf to make sure I'd read it before watching the film.

How weird it all is... I read it in just about a half an hour or so... and it was creepy. Little Coraline is bored... both of her parents work at home, but they are always busy with work and rarely have time to play with her. She wanders about their house (a flat converted from a much larger house) and visits with the neigbors. Even when she is visiting with the neighbors, they don't seem to really notice her, everyone talks at Coraline rather than to her. She enjoys exploring and eventually comes across a door in her flat that opens to a brick wall. Her mother explaines that it used to be a door that went into the neighboring flat, but now it's bricked up in case they rent it out.

Suddenly strange things crawl through the night, and a door that once lead to a wall of bricks, opens to a long dark hallway... to a world disturbingly similar to the one she just left... only with frightening and sinister undertones. Coraline shows her strength, intelligence, cunning and determination to find not only her parents, but also to get back home.

As an adult I thought to myself - this book will scare the crapola out of little ones! In the back Gaiman states that the book was frightening to adults and an exciting adventure to children. Perplexed, I handed it off to my 7 year old... expecting it to look as though it had been through a chipper shredder when handed back to me. Much to my surprise... not only did he read it, but there were no nightmares... he was thrilled with it and can't wait for the movie. I'm still perplexed as to how this book brings out such completely different emotions in children and adults. I don't know that the movie will be able to pull it off... I have a hunch that the movie might encourage leaving the light in the hallway on at night.

Still... if you are an adult, don't let that stop you from reading this wonderful book. I wouldn't compair it to Narnia other than a door opens into another world. Think of it more like Alice in Wonderland... and not the Disney version either... or The Wizard of Oz, focused on the scenes with the flying monkeys and the witch.

Highly recommended, excellent novel.

War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy

2009-01-23T14:35:00.001-05:00

Reviewing classics is always a touchy thing to do… but I’m so freakin proud of myself for reading this book that I had to document it some way. How did I do it? Simple, I read it online with little bits being sent to my email each day… that way I never knew how many millions of pages I had left, and believed that I was making progress.

I have had this book mentioned to me, and quoted to me for years, but I have never met anyone who has actually read it. True the size is daunting… but then again… so is the material. To be honest I didn’t have the first clue what this book was going to be about. It turns out that the reader follows several people, of nobility through the Napoleonic invasion of Russia. When I say several, I mean it… you’ll want to keep a list, and leave lots of room because each person has several variations of their names that are used interchangeably. We follow about 12 main characters and a few other extraneous ones from before the invasion through the end of the conflict. Most of them are nobility and they go through all kinds of soap opera drama, generally self inflicted. Guy A is in love with Girl A but she’s poor, so he marries Girl B who’s really in love with her brother (Guy B I guess) who loves Guy A’s sister (Girl C?), but she tries to run off with Guy C who was just screwing with her head, so now she’s tainted and no one wants to marry Girl C. But Girl C is best of friends with Girl A so they hang out and throw little pity parties for themselves. Meanwhile Guy D is everyone’s pal, who’s married to Girl D who’s really a bit of a hoe, so he wanders about joining clubs and thinking to himself. Then Guy D figures out that he’s in love with Girl C, but she’s still in love with Guy B. Then the war breaks out and all of the guys other than Guy D go to war, and the Girls whine and cry about it… oh, and they move around a lot… seems like they are always packing up and moving… not that they do any of the packing… that’s what servants are for!

So just when we think we are getting a handle on who is who, who they are in love with at the moment, and what the heck is going on… we have a cut scene to – history class… Tolstoy will rant and rave for a bit about war in general, Napoleon, or the idiocy of both Historians and the Russian Military leaders. Okay you think, I can deal with a bit of sarcastic Russian historical education, but just as soon as you get your mind in gear for that – BAM you are knee deep in fighting and trying to remember just who the German guy was and how he was related to all of the people you were reading about before the cut scene.

This book ends up feeling like 3 books mixed into one – a satirical historical text, a family drama, and a wartime epic. Now each in its own is a very interesting tale, but when mashed up together, they can be rather jarring to the mind. I do have to agree with the others that the battle scenes are very well written, and I did enjoy Tolstoy’s commentary on the Russian leadership during the war… and after a while I liked some of his characters. But don’t get too attached to them… Tolstoy has no problem killing off the people you like, and when you get to the end, and are expecting a huge revelation, or some sort of major explosive dynamic finale… the curtain closes without even a spark.

Still, this is a brilliant work… I’m glad I read it, and I wish I knew someone else who had because it would be interesting to discuss it with someone. It will never go down as one of my favorite novels, but it will go down as one of my lifelong accomplishments. Tolstoy’s writing appears excellent (remember, we’re reading a translation so we have to give them credit too) and he has a brilliant wit and handle on his subject matter. I don’t agree with much of his philosophy but it is certainly an interesting topic to read on. If you can make it through 1300 pages of one book, I recommend at least giving this a try.

A Clockwork Orange - Anthony Burgess

2009-01-22T09:35:00.000-05:00

I had “viddied” this “sinny” many times at a young age “Oh my brothers” and it was real “horrorshow” but I had never read the book. Let me tell ya… the language takes a bit to sink in. Even at the end of the book there were bits and peaces that I had to mentally translate to myself. Burgess wrote this from the POV of Alex, a nasty little 14 year old who enjoys theft, burglary, assault and battery, rape and then the dabbles into manslaughter. I say manslaughter because I don’t believe that Alex and his friends intended to kill anyone, they just laid on the beat down a bit too hard.

Oh, and Alex speaks directly to us… the readers, who he refers to as “my brothers” but Alex speaks in a slang that I hear is a mish-mash of Eurasian languages, particularly a lot of Russian thrown in. It takes a while for your brain to process this language. It’s not hard to figure out through context what each of the words means, but it will certainly slow down your reading. The version I read was 149 pages (the original European publishing that DID include the final chapter) and it took me close to a week to finish it. Now I had been told that this was an ultraviolent book… and at the time it may have been… but I didn’t find it to be any more violent than “In Cold Blood” or some other classics that I was encouraged to read. However, the book keeps referring to the goings on as “ultra-violence.” True there are several beatings, a knife fight, a few rapes, drug use, etc… but with the mental translation it took to figure out exactly what was occurring… sure I knew it was wrong, but it didn’t “horrify” me. Then again I grew up in an age where this kind of thing actually does happen. I believe that when this was written, they had a belief that the world was a better place than those of us from later generations believe.

The underlying theme is the question of – if you could force someone to be good… force them to only be capable of doing the right thing… is that good? Or is it better to allow them the option to do evil, provided they have options. What is the “Christian” thing to do in this case? Would God be pleased to see his creations only doing good when they have no choice but to do it? There are other themes running amok through this book, childhood, growing up, the violence inherent in the system, and the futility of rehabilitating prisoners when our prisons are overcrowded and unmanageable to name just a few. There is a lot of meaning in this book, if one can manage their way through it. Some will be turned off by the difficulty of reading the made up language, others will be turned off by the violence… but those who make it through certainly are left with quite a few tidbits to mull over in their minds. I would suggest reading this with someone, or a group, because I assume that the most enjoyment can be reached by really discussing this book with someone. Good luck, enjoy and know that this is a very interesting, vile, yet purposeful book.

The House of the Seven Gables - Nathanial Hawthorne

2009-01-14T09:18:00.001-05:00

So far this is my favorite Hawthorn novel, although to say that is deceiving. I have only read “The House of the Seven Gables” and “The Scarlet Letter” which I loathed… even seeing the cover of the “Scarlet Letter” brings on waves of nausea which only large quantities of sunshine and a good dose of trashy horror novels can cure. But that was long ago, and I am a much more mature reader now, besides, people call this a horror novel.

They Lie.

This is not a horror novel… It’s some sort of family drama/morality tale with a smattering of bad romance thrown in. So is it terrible? No, Hawthorn does have a way with words… but I also believe that he thinks his readers have the short term memory of a melon, therefore he has a tendency to continually bash the reader over the head with an idea until he is absolutely positive that even a mouth breathing troglodyte will not only understand, but also have it burned into the interior of their skull.

Short Summary: Loooong ago a maniacal Puritan leader by the name of Pyncheon falsely executed a local by the name of Matthew Maule by claiming he was a wizard and in league with the devil. As he was hung, Maule uttered a curse on both Pyncheon and his descendents. Pyncheon then takes over Maule’s land, plows his house under and builds his own enormous dwelling on top of it – a house with Seven Gables. Flash forward to the 19th century and we have the descendants of Pyncheon, still living in the house and suffering as their family’s wealth, status and sanity have dwindled to almost nothing. The elderly Hepzibah Pyncheon(that’s a female name by the way) is forced to open a penny shop to try to bring food in. Enter Pheobe Pyncheon, a niece who has come to stay with Hepzibah and is full of life and vitality. They run the shop, do some gardening and entertain Clifford (Hepzibah’s brother) all the while living in fear of their cousin Judge Jaffrey Pyncheon who seems to want something from them.

There were some parts of this book I enjoyed, and the over all concept was interesting… the sins of the father shall be paid for by the sons, but there is a lot that is left unexplained. And the reader is never sure if there truly is a curse or if the fear of a curse is what has kept the Pyncheon family down for all of these generations. Their sense of pride is almost a physical character in the book. In truth there is only one likeable character in the book, and that’s Pheobe… and Hawthorn is so determined to make us like her that he goes on and on about everything she does, how she looks, how bloody cheerful she is, how everything is better as long as Pheobe is around… to the point that the reader hopes a ghost either gets her so that we don’t have to read any more about her or grabs the rest of the household so that she can live in peace.

I understand the historical significance of Hawthorn’s works, and his mastery of the language. However this particular book becomes almost as suffocating as the house itself, dreary, stifling, repetitious and sadly… the reader may find themselves searching for a way to escape (much as Clifford does)… lucky for us the escape is much easier than it is for the characters. There are other classics that I would recommend before digging into this one. It’s not a difficult read, after the first 15 pages or so the language clicks and you can read it quite easily… it’s just not an overly exciting read, nor is it an overly rewarding read.

Drop Dead Gorgeous - Wayne Simmons

2009-01-12T09:22:00.001-05:00

When I read the first page I got a little worried... Oh NO... It's in Irish Slang! But it turns out that it wasn't that bad (nothing like Irving Welsh or James Joyce!) Though there were a few sayings that I wasn't exactly sure what they meant... I knew that they were profanities of some sort and that's enough.

Short Summary: One day most of the world drops dead... kaput! A small number of people are left standing among the corpses, absolutely befuddled and terrified. Several try to band together, some for support, others to try to rebuild some sort of society. Just when we think they may have a handle on it... some of the corpses aren't decomposing the way they should... and may not stay where they are for long.

First of all, this is not a complete novel, this is the beginning of a series, so don't go into this looking for a neat, tidy ending. To be honest this is one of the most well written zombie novels I've encountered. The characters are interesting, human and deeply flawed. There are some we like and some we detest, but they all evoke emotion of some sort or another. My only complaint about the whole novel is that the character that the author seems most infatuated with... is one of the ones I care the least about. Still, there are plenty of people in this novel for me to root for and against. This is also a very attractive novel, the cover art is great, the feel of the book is nice and weighty without the obnoxiousness of being a hardback.

This novel grabbed me from the beginning and pulled me along like a hooked fish through the bloody messy ending. Excellent novel. Blood, gore, zombies, psycho militants, alcoholics, rapists, crashing helicopters and dead people everywhere... what else could you ask for in a book?

Rated R for sure, with no doubt - for language, violence, sex and zombies

The Epic of Gilgamesh - Anonymous

2009-01-12T09:18:00.002-05:00

I'd heard of the Epic of Gilgamesh over and over again from history classes, to the use of it to confirm events in the Bible, but had never bothered to read it before. Perhaps it is the word "Epic" in the title that had conjured up mental images of a giant tome written in verse that deep down I knew I would never comprehend. Then suddenly one day I decided that I needed to at least OWN a copy, even if I never managed to read it. When I opened up my amazon box, imagine my surprise when I pulled out a thin little book of only 128 pages. The introduction is well worth the read, and actually makes up the majority of the book. For people like myself who had no prior knowledge of what the Epic of Gilgamesh really was, this intro is invaluable. It gives not only the history of the tablets, but also goes into the meaning of the tale, and tons of historical information that really added to my enjoyment of the story. The actual Epic goes from page 61-119 and is very interesting to those who have read other mythologies. The characters are very human though I won't say that in today's frame of mind that they are entirely likeable. The story follows King Gilgamesh who is 1/3 human and 2/3 god though the discovery of his brother, their quest to fight Humbaba, their battle with the Bull of the Heavens, and Gilgamesh's search for immortality. To be honest, I wouldn't say that this is a "must read" but it is certainly a very interesting read, simple to follow (at least in this translation) and a real eye opener to the beliefs and customs of the time. I highly recommend this version to those that are reading it outside of a classroom or discussion setting, because the intro was a lifesaver with the background and historical context that it gave. The version I read was the Penguin Classics translated by N. K. Sandar

Broken Angel - Sigmund Brouwer

2009-01-06T13:29:00.003-05:00

So the world has split between the religious fanatics and the non-religious science driven atheists. Separated by a large electrified wall and an even larger moral gap... there is no crossing between Appalachia and "the Outside." Those who live within the confines of the walls are told terrible tales about what goes on "Outside" and anyone who attempts to get there must pass through the land of "The Clan" a group who lives on the border and ascribes to neither side.

But within Appalachia resides Jordan and his daughter Caitlyn... originally from the "Outside" Jordan is hiding many secrets, even from his daughter whom he adores above all else. Caitlyn meanwhile suffers from a disfigurement of the body that no medicine can cure... and something about it has grabbed the attention of both the governments of the Outside and of Appalachia, and now they have sent a merciless group of bounty hunters after her. In a world where everyone is tracked, video cameras are on ever corner and even the horses are GPS monitored... where can she run, and why is it that they all seem to want her so badly?

Though "Broken Angel" takes place in a dystopian future, the focus is not really on that world so much as the relationship between Jordan and Caitlyn, and everyone else's reactions to them. I would have liked to have seen a broader picture of the world that Brouwer created, or more depth and info. Instead what we really have is an extended chase scene from beginning to end with some nice scenery and some interesting concepts that go whizzing by as we continue the chase. The themes and concepts of the book are very simple to pick out - the degeneration of the Church into a corrupt governing body, the thought that a true relationship with God requires no church, the effect of greed and power, the effect of mindless following of faith, Government fear tactics, the government limiting education to increase control... there are plenty more and they are all right out there in the open.

This book is a very simple and fast read... there are a few points of violence that may make some cringe, but as I'm a hardened horror fan they didn't faze me. I wanted to warn you of that since many are touting this as a Christian Adventure novel... which I can sort of see, but DO expect deaths, threats of torture, violence etc. I don't recall any profanity, and the concept of sex is only implied through conversations and looks. On the whole this is a fairly good book and I wouldn't mind reading more from the author.

Jake's Wake - John Skipp and Cody Goodfellow

2009-01-02T23:24:00.001-05:00

So I started and finished my first book of 2009, and it looks like this is going to be a good year. Jake's Wake is a fun filled horror fest of zombie-riffic magnitude.

Short Synopsis - Jake is a Jerk... see how close the words are? Jake is scum of the most terrible sort, womanizing, abusing, just plain evil nasty guy. But he's got charisma... and he decides to throw his rock band plans to the wayside and use this charisma to run a church, being a psychotic television evangelist and massing quite a few fervent followers. Then Jake's penchant for womanizing gets the best of him and he ends up dead... but not for long! Those who were closest to him, and thrilled to be finally out of his evil clutches will have an evening to remember when Jake comes home from his own wake... even nastier than before.

This book is hard to put down, it's so out there and yet so engrossing all at the same time. There is plenty of sex and gore in this book to keep those who worship the red stuff happy. As I said... Jake was not a nice guy before he died. We follow three of the women in his life and their new men as they find themselves trapped in Jake's old house with his living and not quite breathing corpse. And Jake has plans for them.

At first the characters are so aloof and filled with hatred that I wasn't sure there was going to be anyone for us to root for, but as the evening plays on several of them begin to shine and give us hope. There are even one or two that the reader will become attached to. We don't get much background on anyone other than Jake, Gray, and the three women, but it's the ones that we don't get the background on that we end up caring the most for.

There are very strong religious themes in this book that might irritate those who hate reading anything along those lines. The book never approaches "preachy" but it's hard not to get into religion when the main baddie was a fake evangelist. There is a lot of subtext here on people who are searching for hope being easily lead, and charismatic leaders who preach the right words being able to control them. The book never degenerates into Christian bashing, nor does it wave the Christian recruiter flag, it is more a commentary of the Jim and Tammy Fay Bakers in the world. But never fear... this book really doesn't rise much beyond a fun filled horror novel, no real thought required.

I have to admit that the ending was unexpected, not all of it, but a chunk of it was out there... strangely if you had told me that the book would end like that, I probably would have said "No, that's a terrible ending!" but as I said, I didn't expect it... and it worked for me. On the whole this is a very strong book with a lot of enjoyable parts and a satisfying ending.

Succulent Prey - Wrath James White

2008-12-31T20:33:00.001-05:00

Across the internet I've seen this book rated both 1 to 5 stars... people have loved it, people have loathed it, people have called it the next step in horror, people have called it literary torture porn... so of course with all of the varied reviews, I had to read it.

Short Summary: We follow Joseph Miles from his childhood, where he is abducted, tortured and then released, to his college years where he begins having terrible urges to gnaw on lovely co-eds. He belives that being a serial killer is a contagious disease that he caught as a child... and now he's hunting for a cure before he starts chomping on the woman he loves.

This is the first book by Mr. White that I have read, and he has a very interesting style. This book is VERY gory, and filled with sexual deviance and perversions, cannibalism, rape, sodomy, and just about any other type of sickening thing you can imagine reading about. I don't consider myself actually hardened from all the horror I have read, Ketchum and Masterton have made me squemish before... so I was confused at first as to why all of this gore didn't really affect me. And there is a LOT of gore, just about every page is smattered with it. I almost wonder if there wasn't too much gore, actually I'm almost sure there was too much gore, it hit a point where the reader just ends up numb to it and all of the shock value is gone.

I also didn't particularly care for any of the characters... we follow the serial killer as our main character... but we never really get to know him so we're not all that worried if he gets caught or killed... perhaps if this had been more first person, or if our character had shared more thoughts with us beyond his cannibalism. There were no dreams, hopes for a future, relationships or anything for the reader to root for. Our Heroine was almost likeable, but any hope she had of being memorable in the long term ended with the second to the last scene. Speaking of which... I would have probably given this book 4 stars had the last two scenes been cut from the book. They were both completely unnecessary and they blew much of the premise that the book appeared to be working toward. I would have rather not known where certain people ended up then to have their ending seem so oddly out of line with where it felt like it should have been.

I can't go into much more then that without mentioning any spoilers, so I apologize if it seems vague. I think there are a lot of people out there who will really enjoy this book, Laymon fans in particular may now have a new author to thrill over. I will probably read more by Mr. White, though I hope in his next book he tries harder to scare me rather than just gross me out.

The Black Cathedral - L.H. Maynard & M.P.N. Sims

2008-12-23T10:43:00.001-05:00

This is my first venture into the world of Maynard and Sims, so I don’t know if this is part of a series or not. The little blurb under the title of “A Department 18 Novel” implies to me that there are more novels (or intended novels) about the group from Department 18.

So who is Department 18? Why they are a government group of Psychics, telekinetics, and ghost busters… not that we get to see them bust any ghosts or anything. So what is Department 18 doing? Well when they aren’t bickering amongst themselves and puffing up their petty egos, they are investigating why a bunch of people have disappeared on a Scottish island with no traces left… not even the helicopter.

This book opens well; the first scene with Robert in the house is almost wonderful. The bugs, were a chilling touch… and the way it wrapped up… well it was disappointing but it was still a fun scene. Then we get into the real meat of the tale… disappearing people on an island! This book seemed like it was really going somewhere… then we have about half the book of them researching and monologue after monologue of back story, personal feelings, previous relationships, etc… it bogs down quickly. By the time we get to the island I was thrilled to see how these annoying folks were going to meet their end… and even that turned out to be a letdown.

This book suffers from what I like to think of as “Too much magic.” We have the psychics… and that has to be explained to us, as well as their powers, and how their powers affect them, etc. Then we have to learn about ley lines, and have that explained to us… then we have to look into the malevolent evil on the island and that takes pages and pages of exposition and explanation. By the time we are done everyone seems to have some sort of super power, the baddie is a superbaddie, and people disappearing isn’t all that scary to begin with… mainly because there is always the chance they could reappear.

I normally like this kind of tale, but the problem was that there was so much explaining going on, that I really didn’t care about what happened anymore. I was also a bit disappointed in the ending… rather over the top without the heart. The actual writing style was good enough… but they never managed to pull me into their story… rather it seemed like they kept pushing the reader out and reminding them “it’s just a story; don’t invest too much in to this.” I’m not quite sure why that wall was there, perhaps the characters, perhaps the exposition, or maybe the story just went too far for me to lock in on it. Still there are plenty of people out there who will like this novel… it just wasn’t for me.

Dirty Jobs - Christopher Moore

2008-12-23T08:41:00.002-05:00

What are the guys that aren't Alpha Males? Why they are Beta Males of course! Charlie Asher is the quintessential Beta Male... amazed and terrified by women, passive aggressive, and perpetually panicking over his hyperactive imagination. Poor Charlie loses his wife during childbirth and is left a single dad to raise Sophie. Unfortunately for Charlie, he also acquired a new profession as his wife passed away. Charlie has become death, no not the death with the big D, more like the Santa's Elves of Death... he, along with a few other San Francisco residents collect soul vessels after people pass on and get them to their proper places. But poor Charlie doesn't get it... and to make matters worse he has quite the assortment of odd neighbors, employees, family, and random passersby to make his quest even more difficult. And if he doesn't succeed? Well then the Sewer Harpies will come out and plunge the world in Darkness.

Much like Moore's other books, the greatest amount of humor comes from the supporting cast. Lilly, the off-kilter goth girl who works for Charlie (you may recognize her from You Suck - She is Abby's best friend) Ray, who is Charlie's other employee at the antique shop, another Beta Male who is always looking for love on foreign bride sites. Then you have the foreign neighbors Ms. Korjev and Ms. Ling who help to raise Sophie while Charlie is trying to figure the Death thing out. And of course with this being in San Francisco you have the Emperor and his two sidekicks as well as a minor unidentified appearance from Jody (from Bloodsucking Fiends).

I found this book to be both hilarious and sweet. Charlie as a single dad is touching... panicking over everything that could happen to his new infant daughter, while having to deal with the loss of his wife and a new found concept of death. One can only assume (not only from the content of the book, but also from the acknowledgements) that this book was written after a painful loss on the part of the author. There is a little more soul searching than one is used to in a Moore book, but that doesn't keep the laughs from coming. I actually found the slightly more serious aspect to be refreshing and a great counterbalance to the humor that Moore is so famous for. By far my favorite characters are the two foreign neighbors, the scene with the dead hamsters is one of the funniest things I've read in a while, and the Hell Hounds were a wonderful addition... especially everyone's reactions to them.

True, many of the characters here are a bit stereotypical, but rather than detracting from the story, these stereotypes are molded into entirely new creations and made into characters that you can't help but to love. There is a plot here, and it is true that the ending is a bit weak, and not what the reader wants... but we don't read Moore for the plot, we read Moore for the wonderful people who inhabit his world. Because in the end, we all know someone just like them. I highly recommend this book, but would suggest reading it after "Bloodsucking Fiends" and "You Suck" because you will have a better appreciation for Rivera and the Emperor. That and since they all three take place in the same literary world, you might as well read them in order. Happy Reading!

The Lust Lizard of Melancholy Cove - Christopher Moore

2008-12-23T08:39:00.001-05:00

Madness... this novel is complete and total madness from beginning to end. Returning once again to Pine Cove we can only call this a sequel to "Practical Demonkeeping" in that it takes place in Pine Cove several years after Catch has been taken care of. The Demon is referenced once and several of the town's folk are back, specifically Mavis, owner of the "Head of the Slug" tavern, Jenny - Still working as a waitress, and HP, who is still recovering from Pine Cove's last battle with the bizarre.

Theo is the town constable of Pine Cove and boy does he have a rough week ahead of him. Starting with a suicide and ending with a random sea beast named Steve terrorizing and consuming the weaker minded people of Pine Cove, as Theo says - I didn't get training for this. The maddening series of events that drives this novel to its completely insane and fun filled ending includes the town shrink replacing everyone's meds with placebos, a mad biologist studying rats and chasing them all over town, A washed up and completely insane B-Movie queen tearing about town wielding a sword and wearing only her barbarian bikini, Theo's boss - The sheriff who has a few secrets of his own and Catfish - a blues singer who has seen Steve the Sea Beast before.

Moore manages to hit a level of comedic insanity in this book, without ever losing control of it, which is amazing in itself. As always his characters are strange, wacky, and entirely loveable. The plot, though insane, is always fun, and his dialogue is spot on. All Moore fans have their favorite book, this is rarely listed, the reason being that many of his others (Bloodsucking Fiends, Biff, and Dirty Jobs) have much stronger plotlines while retaining the completely mad characters that everyone falls in love with. This is stronger than his first novel "Practical Demonkeeping" but not as strong as some of his others. If you are an avid Moore fan, I would suggest reading this after Demonkeeping, if you have never read Moore before, I would suggest starting with either "Bloodsucking Fiends" or "The Gospel According to Biff." Still I highly recommend this to Moore fans, it's a fun ride and you will find yourself giggling throughout.

Parent note - Moore's books are NOT okay for kids. There is foul language, bizarre sex scenes, and often a few gross death scenes.

The Reach - Nate Kenyon

2008-12-19T09:36:00.002-05:00

Many have likened this novel to King’s “Firestarter” and it is very easy to see why. We have a little girl, with unimaginable power, an evil institution trying to bend and wield her power and an unlikely hero trying to save the child. Kenyon even named a secondary character “Charlie” as if to acknowledge the similarities and give homage to King. But “The Reach” although it shares so many similarities, reads as an entirely different story.

Short Synopsis: Jess Chambers is a star student in Psychiatry… she has come to the attention of her professor, Dr. Jean Shelley. Dr. Shelley decides to put Jess to the test on a very special patient… a little girl by the name of Sarah who has spent her entire life in an institution, the girl is diagnosed as schizophrenic and has not spoken in months. “Just try to befriend her, see if she will open up to you” Dr. Shelley tells Jess. What they didn’t count on was the door they opened by inviting Jess into Sarah’s life, and what it would lead to in the end. A series of twists and turns later… we come to an explosive ending that would make for great film.

From the opening scene I loved this book. It was fun, exciting, and elicited a concern from the reader for many of the characters. Who is good, who is bad, who is lying, who is truly in need, who can be trusted… the tables turn over and over as Jess tries to piece together the life of Sarah, and help her to come into her own. Men in dark suits with guns and scientists with nasty ambitions soon come into the picture and Jess finds that no one can be trusted. Is Sarah evil? Is she truly the antichrist as her family believes? Or is just a scared little girl with an unholy power?

The book moves quickly, you will find yourself whipping through the pages until you explode into the ending. The author has said that this is the first in a series of possibly 3 books, but don’t let that stop you. Kenyon DOES wrap this one up nicely – no cliff hangers to leave you angry or frustrated. To be honest, I did not find this book to be scary – I found it to be more entertaining than anything else. I highly recommend this book, Kenyon was good when he wrote “Bloodstone” and he is even better with “The Reach” I look forward to his next novel.

Child of Darkness Child of Light - Dennis Dufour

2008-12-17T22:37:00.002-05:00

I know there is another book with this same title, and no, I haven't read it. But I did read this one, cover to cover, in about 45 minutes.
"NO WAY" you say?
"Yes Way" I reply.
First of all, the book is only 171 pages, and it's not like they packed the text in there tightly. So is it good or bad that I read the whole book while waiting for a meatloaf to cook? I guess it depends on the reader... whoever they are, they will fly from beginning to end. The text flows well, the majority of the characters are stereotypes that we know (sure they are multifaceted stereotypes, but they are sterotypes none the less) so we don't have much trouble figuring out who is the good guy and why we like him.

Short Synopsis (but better than the back of the book): We have a nasty serial killer on the loose, and he has a very specific agenda... harming our hero - Simon Reynolds. Good thing Mr. Reynolds is a detective! We follow Simon through the investigation as the case gets personal, and he discovers that everyone he holds dear may be in jeopardy if he cannot catch the killer... a killer who knows him better than he should.

Ignore the back cover because it makes this book sound like a bad rehash of Law and Order. In a way this IS like most of the cop books/movies you've seen/read. You feel like you know all of the characters, you feel fairly comfortable that you know where this is headed, and right from the beginning you feel safe with how this book is going to turn out. For having a serial killer, the book is very low on the gore scale... though we see one of the murders, the truly disgusting aspects are kept from us. The focus of the book is instead on Simon and his search for the killer.

So is this a good book? I will say that this is a wonderful author capable of writing a very fast paced and fun novel. This book IS fun. Where is the problem? Well, from the second he walked across the page I knew who the killer was... but I thought - maybe he's a red herring... but... he wasn't. There WERE a few red herrings but none jumped out at me like the true killer... which kind of took a lot of the fun out of the ending for me. On the whole this book was very safe, it played it safe in every sense of the word, it never strayed out of it's genera, it never pushed the envelope, and it wrapped up just how the reader wanted it to. Sometimes you need a book like that. Lucky for me I was in the right mood for the book, on a different day I might have hated it. But as it stood, it was a very enjoyable 45 minutes spent reading.

If I could change anything about this book, I would cut out the paragraphs from the serial killer's point of view, and then smash this book toghther with another as a double feature having both run at about 120 pages or so. That would be in my ideal world. But even if that never happens, this is a fun bus read, or short plane trip read. I wouldn't mind checking out more from this author in the future.

Not a Good Time to Die – Ray Spengler

2008-12-16T14:41:00.001-05:00

What is the worst thing about this book? The fact that the synopsis does no justice to the tale contained within. After reading the back of this book I thought to myself – “dear Lord I really don’t want to read this” but once I opened it up and started reading, the book was wonderful. Sure the idea is very similar to the Butterfly Effect, but the story is different enough that there is very little comparison.

A more accurate summary: Douglas has just lost his wife; Jane, to Cancer… in his grief he considers taking his own life, and suddenly discovers that time has stopped… only its two hours before his wife’s death. Now he has the ability to go back in time to different scenes in his life and relive them, can he find a way to save her? Or is there a deeper meaning to this sudden gift of time?

So as a reviewer I’m going to tell you, ignore the cover art which makes this look like a gothic horror – there’s no horror here. Ignore the title, which sounds like a James Bond film – there’s not much action here. And most of all, Ignore that little blurb on the back of the book that makes this sound like a bad sci-fi channel movie. What you do have here is a story of a man who is very much in love, trying to go back and right the wrongs of his past, to save life of the woman he loves. As we go back in time with him (he’s an old man now) there are 35 years of marriage, ups and downs, joy and pain. The readers relive all of this with him, hoping that this time he’ll say the right thing, or make the right choice to change the course… or if nothing else to be a better husband. He never doubted his love for her… but when traveling through your life in high speed… your negatives glare out at you. And maybe this time he can to it? His time is running out, and his options are running thin… why would God give him this gift to relive if it wasn’t to save her?

Douglas is a very human character… at times we love him, at times we want to slap the bejeezus out of him. Many times we’ll wonder why Jane stayed with him at all. The story is very human… something that perhaps we all wish we could do after the loss of a loved one. For a first time author, this is a very good book. As far as an age rating – this one is not for the kiddies, minor instances of foul language, infidelity, a couple of lives lost, some bad behavior, alcohol abuse, basically think of bad things in your life that you wish you could change, and determine if you want your child reading about it. This book is NOT graphic, but the subject material might offend some parents. Also there are religious themes in this book that may upset non-Christians.

Either way, I recommend reading this book.

Not a Good Time to Die

A Bridge Back - Patrick M Garry

2008-12-14T15:50:00.004-05:00

Nate Morrissey has hidden from his life and his past in the millions of people in NYC. Now a high profile lawyer, Nate has been asked to take up a new case. This case will lead him back to his hometown of Mount Kelven, a sleepy town he has avoided for over 19 years. He has hidden from that town and everyone in it since the funeral, the accident that changed his life forever, and the event that he was never able to forgive himself for. Now Nate must go back, and dig into the accident that claimed his parent's lives, and destroyed his. But what will he find when he returns after a 19 year absence.

A Bridge Back is a very quick read, the prose flows smoothly allowing the reader to fly through page after page without even noticing it. The characters we encounter are fairly multidimensional, each of them with their little quirks and their own past. Garry (our author) spends much of this book focused on our characters and their inner selves, which I truly enjoy. I wish he had spent a little more time giving physical details about the people and places though that is only a minor complaint in the grand scheme of things.

In the end this is a very enjoyable book about dealing with the pains of our past, and getting through them. Forgiveness, love, charity, and trying to make a better future rather then running from previous hurts. Being an avid horror and thriller fan, I did not expect to truly enjoy this book, and I have to admit that I was pleasantly surprised. I would consider it more of a Drama than anything else... I mean sure there is a bit of legal intrigue and some mystery in there, but the focus is on overcoming the past. And in the end who DOESN'T have pains from their past that they would rather just run away from. That is primarily why this book is so accessible.

As far as age ranges go I don't recall any undue profanity. Due to some of the themes involved I would probably hold off on the under 15 crew. This book is geared for adults but should be accessible to the 15 and up crew. If you are a fan of redemption tales, then pick yourself up a copy of this. It is an excellent book with very few flaws. And the flaws it has are so minor that you probably won't even know they are there (example - missing closing parentheses). Again I highly recommend this book, enjoy!

The Conscience of Abe's Turn - J. Timothy King

2008-12-08T08:53:00.001-05:00

Based off of the title of this book ending with “Volume 1, Season 1, episodes 1-4” I am led to believe that there are probably many more books to come in this series. To be honest I don’t know if I will read any of the follow up novels.

Short Summary: In a small fictional town, a sheriff holds the town under his thumb by abusing his power and smiting his enemies with brute political and police force. Our four main characters, Ted, Clydene, Mira, and Michael, fight the sheriff’s power through protests. They find themselves in a quagmire of trouble as one is falsely arrested. They encounter several individuals who need their help in fighting the Sheriff and his abuse of power.

The writing style in this book flows well and is very easy to read for the most part. At times the technical jargon and step by step wading through of the computer process that Clyde goes through becomes tedious and it becomes quite easy for the reader to tune out. However, on the whole this is a very simple book to get through, and I notice only one typo through the entire book. The cover and printing is attractive enough, and the writer is skilled. At the end of the book I did have trouble when we started leaping backward and forward in time, predominantly because the story had been linear up until the last 50 pages where we begin leaping backward and forward in time for no real discernable purpose. I didn’t feel that the “back in time” bit added anything at all to the rest of the story. Perhaps this will become more important in a follow up book; however as a stand alone, I felt that it should have been cut because it adds more confusion and important information.

I wish I could rate this book higher, because the writing style is very effective and the author has a wonderful flow of words. The tale itself however was a fairly overblown story that my mind could not completely wrap around. Perhaps it is supposed to be an allegory to other current world events, but for the life of me I can’t understand why a group of professionals who are supposed to be so brilliant are holding protests and playing hippy saboteurs rather than just contacting the Feds and getting their problems solved. While I was reading I just kept shaking my head at how overblown the plot seemed to be, and at the same time how self-important the characters were that they were willing to break the law, and endanger themselves rather then just going to the proper authorities and letting them take care of it all. I almost felt that rather then fixing the problems in their little town, they were dragging it out in the attempt to make themselves saviors. Others may not read it that way, but to be honest, it’s how it came across to me. As I said, this is a well written book, but in my opinion, it just was not a very interesting book.

The Conscience of Abe's Turn: The Birth of the Conscience, Volume 1 (Season 1, Episodes 1-4)

Great Expectations - Charles Dickens

2008-12-05T11:26:00.000-05:00

Yes, Dickens was paid by the word when writing this.
Yes, this is a big book
Yes, if you were forced to read it in school, you probably hated
Yes, if you read it on your own at or after age 25… you probably loved it.

I for one, thought this book was great, sure it was wordy, but it was not wordy in that “what the heck is he trying to say” way that gets many other wordy books (Crime and Punishment – though I blame the translators for that one).

Short Summary: This is the story of Pip, starting from a young age after his parents and many younger siblings are deceased and he is being raised by his militant sister and her lovable but slightly dense husband, Joe. Pip has very little hope of a future other than an apprenticeship with Joe as a Blacksmith. Suddenly… doors start opening for Pip, and opportunities present themselves to him. He accepts but never knows who or why strings are being pulled in the background to open these doors for him. We follow Pip through his life as he accepts these opportunities, and they lead him down a strange but wonderful path of self discovery, maturity, and opening his eyes to the real world.

The reason this book is so effective is because Pip is so real. We follow him through his blunders and successes, we dread his putting his foot in his mouth, saying the wrong things to Biddy, or Ms. Haversham, and we rejoice when he commits selfless acts and hate him when he commits selfish ones. It is my personal opinion that this book will have more of an affect on the late twenty year olds and up because by then you have suffered a bit, and made some of the same mistakes as Pip, you have wandered through finding your way in the world, and the confusion of who you are, wishing you were something else, loving what or who you cannot have, and figuring out what path to put your life on.

The rest of the cast of characters is quite a collection of multifaceted, entertaining, and interesting people. Ms. Haversham is a favorite of many, so strange, so tortured, so heartless, and so intriguing… then we have Dear old Joe, so Simple, and mild, and encouraging. Joe’s love is unconditional and unwavering. Biddy, is so loyal, so kind, and so honest, then you have her polar opposite, Estella. There are so many other characters that are interesting, fun to read about and that you will have strong feelings for one way or another.

I highly recommend this book, even though it is over a century old, the language is not difficult to read (very little work required) and the plot and characters are stellar. True there are no explosions, but a book can be engaging with out them. Give it a try.

Great Expectations (Oxford World's Classics)

One Flew Over the Cuckoo's Nest - Ken Kesey

2008-12-04T16:09:00.001-05:00

A short summary for those of you who are unaware: In the late 60’s a psych ward takes on a new patient by the name of R.P. McMurphy, up until this point the ward has been run with an iron fist by Nurse Ratched aka “Big Nurse.” When McMurphy enters the ward he instantly befriends the patients and befuddles the staff while making it his personal mission to bring Big Nurse to her knees. What follows is a psychological game of chess between McMurphy and Nurse Ratchet with the stakes being the mental stability of the rest of the ward.

This movie has always had a special place in my heart, so it is only natural that eventually I would get around to reading the book. Even though it appears as though the movie was about as faithful to the book as I have ever seen… there are very subtle yet profound differences between the two. The predominant difference is the point of view. The movie, takes the viewpoint of McMurphy where as the book is from the viewpoint of Chief Bromden. Now either the Chief is more disturbed than we are first lead to believe or there is some CRAZY stuff going on in that hospital. I would have to say that a few of the scenes in the book had me puzzled until I realized that good old Chief wasn’t exactly playing with a full deck. What we see through his eyes is very disturbing, surreal, and at times the reader finds themselves mentally translating what he is relating into something that we can comprehend as physically possible.

There are many themes in this book, the one most people bring up is man vs. the corrupted establishment, but threaded through are also the themes of self reliance, the state of the mental health industry back then, society’s blaming anyone who goes against the establishment on mental illness, the power of society in bringing down the individual, then we also touch on the treatment of Native Americans, and a very interesting male vs. female battle. Though I’m not entirely sure what I was supposed to walk away with in regards to all of these themes, this was still a very well written book. The version I read was 278 pages but took me a full week to read. I’m not entirely sure why, but for being so short, it really does read very slowly. I recommend reading this book, it is truly a modern classic, if one still considers the 1970’s modern. Either way this is an excellent read and it is extremely engaging, particularly once McMurphy and Big Nurse begin their mental game of chess… each trying to out do the other while maintaining complete composure. It is such a violent and hate filled battle to be fought so subtly. Each play is genius, but the players are never to be out done by one another. Read the book, then watch the movie, both are stellar examples of their craft.

One Flew over the Cuckoo's Nest

Bite - Richard Laymon

2008-11-22T16:41:00.000-05:00

Boo to whoever wrote the synopsis on the back of this book, and Boo to Richard Laymon for what this book turned into. This book is sold as a vampire novel… it’s not, in fact the “vampire” has metal fangs and spends 90% of the book in the trunk of a car with a stake through him, looking very very dead. This book follows Cat and Sam through a series of bad luck and even worse choices. The choices they make are so dumb, that the reader will find themselves hoping that the vampire WOULD come back and do the two of them in before they have a chance to breed and create anyone else as dumb as the two of them.

Short Summary: Cat shows up out of nowhere on the front steps of her long forgotten ex-boyfriends house. She asks him (after not seeing him for 10 years) to slay a vampire for her… so without a single question he goes “Okay” and they slay the vampire. Then they pop the Vampire’s body into the trunk and head off to who knows where to try to bury the body. But they get a flat, and meet up with a serial killer, and some hostages, and some other nastiness… but they laugh and have sex through all of it.

It seems like this should have been at least an okay book. But it wasn’t… in reality this was a very boring book with little to no action, lots of whining and Cat yapping about the 57 or so times she has been raped, bitten by vampires, beaten by men, forced into abortions etc, and Sam just sort of nods at her and says something along the lines of “well that sucks” and she nods. These have to be two of the dumbest, and most boring characters ever put into a horror novel. And the sad thing is that if either of them had a lick of sense this book would have only been about 50 pages long… and better for it. The dialogue is terrible, the plot is full of more holes than a cheese grater, and the ending leaves the reader wondering – why did I just read that… I could have put it down and read something else… or picked my toes for 3 hours and had a better time.

Sorry, I can’t even recommend this to Laymon fans. The gore isn’t up to his standards… there is of course lots of sex and body descriptions… and I think it is a Laymon requirement to use the word “Rump” at least 30 times per book. I won’t say that it’s the worst book I’ve ever read… but it will be one that I quickly forget.

Beware - Richard Laymon

2008-11-19T11:07:00.001-05:00

This is Laymon's most recent re-release (as of Nov 08). This feature story is shorter than most standard Leisure books, coming in at about 266 pages. The rest of the book is a teaser for "Dark Mountain" which is being re-released in March of 2009. I am not sure if this original story was published while he was alive or if it was one of the many that was dug out of some mysterious safe and published after his death.

Short Summary: Lacey is a reporter for the local paper in a small town. When something strange begins happening at the market she, along with several other townsfolk go to investigate. What they first assume to be vandalism quickly escalates into murder and rape, with a trail of bodies piling up and no sign of a killer anywhere. When things get even worse for Lacey, she goes on the run...

Though the book started out okay, by the time I got to the end, I was ready to put it down. I quite enjoyed the opening, when I believed our problem to be a malevolent ghost. Then they brought in the voodoo and I sort of nodded and thought, okay a little voodoo can cause the ghosts, I can live with that. But then we crossed the line and just kept on going... when the reality of what was being sold to me came about... I was pretty well beyond my ability to suspend my disbelief. You can add too much fantastical crap into one novel and end up with garbage. I won't say this became utter trash, but I really wasn't happy with the outcome. I remember reading in a screenwriting group that you can only have 1 truly magical bit in a story and have people buy it... that you can have aliens, or you can have mermaids, but you cant have aliens AND mermaids or the audience won't remember what they've seen. That's pretty much where this novel failed to me. We had Voodoo cults/government groups? We have sacrifices, we have invisible people, we have random good guys who pop up out of nowhere and just happen to know a guy already working on the case, there is just too much for me to have to choke down to believe it...

I'm not sure where in the scheme of things Laymon wrote this novel, it's not his best and it's not his worst. There are plenty of rapes, and naked women... not so much gore as one might expect with a serial killer/rapist and a handful of Voodoo sacrifices. Mostly we just have a sadistic rapist and a bunch of naked women and a whole lot of running around. I think what disappointed me was that I was really excited about the beginning when I thought it was going to be a ghost story. Now I have read the original Jules Verne book that he took this idea from, and I have to say... that Laymon's treatment really didn't impress me at all.

His characters are still stiff and unbelievably one sided. The woman does a lot of running, screaming, trying to fight back, and getting raped anyway. The men are either complete dolts, or they are sadistic rapist murderers. And when Scott and his buddy come onto the scene, I couldn't help but roll my eyes and think "how convenient." In fact I found myself thinking that quite a bit through this book. Still, it's only 266 pages and if you are a Laymon fan, you won't be able to get your fix again until March of 09. For rabid Laymon fans, I would say go pick this up and get your fix. For first time Laymon readers, I would start somewhere else because this is nowhere near one of his best works.

Beware

One Foot In The Black - Kurt Kamm

2008-11-19T10:57:00.000-05:00

I'll be honest; I wasn't exactly excited to read a book about Firefighting in the California wilderness... I'm not firefighter material, and I'm a strictly East Coast resident... though when I lived in FL it seemed liked I-95 burned from Jax to Orlando every year, and that every year it was the "Worst fire in Florida History."

Short Summary: At the tender age of 19 our young man, Kowalski travels from Saginaw, Michigan out to Auburn, California to learn to be a firefighter. Kowalski comes from a troubled home, and brings more mental baggage with him than physical baggage. Once he arrives in California he trains as a wildlands firefighter, learns what it is to become part of a brotherhood, and deals with the emotional pains of his past.

This book is set up in alternating chapters, one from the present where Kowalski is learning to be a firefighter, followed by one from his traumatic childhood. I'm not entirely sure that this was the most effective way to get the story across... and the biggest problem I had with this book is that I'm not sure what story the author was trying to tell. He did an excellent job with the technical aspect of training camp, firefighting, and the frat-like camaraderie of the firefighters. Kamm also did an excellent job with making the reader despise the boy's home life, particularly his father. There were other areas however, that felt very weak to me, and a chapter or two that were unnecessary in my mind.

For example, the character of TB is supposed to be a surrogate father figure to our lead, however as readers, this relationship is never fully shown or developed. I felt that for the effect of the relationship on the book, more time should have been spent on their relationship than some of the training they were going through. I also felt that the hotel scene, as well as much of the bus ride could have been cut and replaced with more relationship building chapters. Our lead character is a hothead, and it's easy to see why he would be... but as a reader, his choices in dealing with others make him difficult to connect with. We read dialogue, and we see them train to be firefighters, but there are no truly defined relationships in the book other than proximity.

This is by no means a bad book... where it is strong, it is very strong. If the weaker portions could be brought up to the rest of the book, then this could probably land on Oprah's book club. For Firefighters or those that love firefighting in general, this is a must read already, because that is the true strength of this book.

Parent Rating: Not for the kiddies - sex, domestic violence, some profanity, forest fire victims. Probably okay for 15 and up.

One Foot In The Black

Tale of Two Cities

2008-11-19T10:44:00.001-05:00

It occurred to me that although I had been working my way through the classics, I had never read a “real version” of a Dickens novel. Oh sure, I had read the children’s version of “Oliver Twist” and have been to see the play of “A Christmas Carol” probably 15 times… but I had never actually sat down and tried to read any real Dickens. Now I don’t know if this is a good place to start or not… but this is where I started.

It took a while to really get into the book, the language was a bit overbearing at first, and the characters were a bit hard to keep sorted out in my mind. But then we get to the release of the good Doctor Mannette things pick up… I was trucking along, managing with the language and then in the middle I became bogged down with confusion… I struggled for a chapter or two and then hit the last quarter of the book… and let me tell you, all of the confusion was worth it if only for the last chapter.

Dickens main characters are actually rather flat and one-sided, however he makes up for it with the power and intrigue in his supporting cast. Some of the supporting characters in this novel are among the most interesting and either lovable or detestable that I have encountered. With the engrossing backdrop of the French Revolution, and heads being lopped of by Lady Guillotine every other moment… this book really focuses not on the revolution, but on the effects of the revolution on a select group of people. The Title implies that this will be a tale predominantly about London and Paris, but in reality the title is very misleading. The crux of the true story is about Paris, and our character’s attempts to remove themselves from it.

I hate to say more, I went into this book knowing nothing about it, and because of that I was able to be shocked and almost brought to tears by the beauty and power of the ending. I highly recommend it, even though many will struggle through the middle, know that the ending is well worth the struggle. There is a reason this is listed one of the “1001 books to read before you die” there is a power to this story that will resound with you long after you close the book.

A Tale of Two Cities (Penguin Classics)

The Crown Conspiracy - Michael J Sullivan

2008-11-10T09:55:00.002-05:00

I will admit, that over the last few years I have grown away from the fantasy genre, so this book sat in my "to be read" pile a bit longer than it should have. However once I opened it up, I was thrilled with the story. What we have here is a very well thought out tale of intrigue... regicide, battles over the throne, conspiracy, and two thieves thrown into the mix keep the story line moving at a rapid pace.
A short summary: To expert thieves are commissioned to steal something from the castle, little do they know that they are to take the fall for the murder of the king. When faced with the executioner's block, they are approached by an unlikely person to commit another crime which will possibly save their lives and possibly the kingdom.
I hate to tell you any more than that lest the story be spoiled. The author has gone to such great care to weave this tale with just the right amount of suspense as to keep the reader glued to the book. As far as the fantasy aspect of this novel, I was thrilled that true fantasy was very rarely employed. Sure there is a bit of magic, and an elf or two, but they are simply background to an excellent tale about a kingdom in trouble that seeks help from the unlikeliest of its subjects.
The characters are almost instantly loveable, they are all stereotypes but I wouldn't really hold that against the author. Sometimes a good stereotype is what a book needs. We have the benevolent thieves, the whore with the heart of gold, the reluctant prince, the evil nobleman... so much of this book will be very familiar to the reader, but for some reason this really didn't bother me. I did feel that there were are few areas which could have used a little more umph, or a bit more follow through, however I feel that this is probably the first of at least 3 novels following our new king and his thieving friends. If that is the case, then there is still plenty of time to wrap up these dangling ends. Would I read these follow up novels? It is highly likely. This is by far one of the most well written independent novels I have had the pleasure of reading. I highly recommend it to both lovers of fantasy, and also those who like stories along the lines of the King Arthur legends, and the tales of the Green Knight.
As far as age appropriateness, there is violence however it is not overly descriptive, there are prostitutes but their job is never detailed and then there are the questionable jobs of our heroes. I would say that this is probably readable by the 12 and up crew, however I would read it first to determine if it would be okay for your specific 12 year old. I would guess that by 15-16 they would be capable of fully enjoying the intrigue that is entailed. Again I highly recommend this book.

The Crown Conspiracy

Children of the Night - David Stuart Davies

2008-11-10T09:48:00.001-05:00

The Vampire, more than any other creature of gothic folklore, has been defined by the fiction written about it. This book contains many of the short stories that were defining moments in Vampire lore. The first to mention staking a vampire, the first female vamp, talk of burying them at a crossroads minus their heads, the first where they shapeshift. For true vampire lovers, this book is a must read. There are a total of 12 tales in this book beginning with the "Vampire of Croglin Hall", and then moving on to such famous tales as "Varney the Vampyre," "The Curse of the Vourdalack," "Carmilla", and "The Horla." There is even an excerpt from Stoker's "Dracula" titled "Dracula and the Three Brides" which is in my oppinion, one of the most horrific scenes in that illustrious novel. Each of these tales is by a different author, and they range in time from the mid 1800's through Edith Wharton's Bewitched which was written in the 1900's. I am not counting the story of "The Welcome Visitor" which was written by the man who compiled these tales... it is not up to the quality of the other stories that inhabit this fine collection. My personal favorite is "The Curse of the Vourdalak" which I immediately recognized as the foundation for the beginning of almost every modern Vampire tale (you can see it is almost identical to the opening of McCammon's Vampire tale "They Thirst"). I also had a fondness for "Carmilla" which was odd because it was so clear to me what would happen. I could not even imagine the horror readers must have felt reading these stories for the first time back when they were written. In this day and age we have been bombarded by Vampire tales and movies... but the horror that readers must have felt back in the 1800's when they read these for the first time must have been amazing. Each of these stories is deserving of a read by itself, but to have them all compiled together in a single book makes this a must own for any fan of the Vampire legend. You will not find your debonair, suave vampires who woo women with their charms... instead you will find the horror of destroyed villages, children hiding in their beds as beasts lurk through their towns, women wasting away in terror from unknown assailants, men being stalked by invisible beings who drain their life as they sleep. If you are looking for a quick and easy read, this is not it... having been written in the late 1800's through early 1900's, the language will take a bit to sink in. Once it does you will regret that we have long ago lost the beauty of our language.

Children of the Night (Wordsworth Mystery & Supernatural) (Wordsworth Mystery & Supernatural)

The Last of the Mohicans - James Fenimore Cooper

2008-11-06T10:17:00.001-05:00

Well, I'm glad I finished it, though I can't really say I enjoyed reading this book. I had such high hopes, and perhaps that was the problem. I remember when the movie came out and we watched it with my Grandpa (who is now 94!) he said that he had read the books when he was around 12 and that they were his favorite stories of all time. He was of course very angry that the movie didn't follow the book.

I am now 30 and finally getting around to reading it and for the life of me I cannot imagine a 12 year old both reading and enjoying this book. The story itself is fine, highly romanticized and inaccurate historical accounts of the Delaware and Hurons. And evil Huron kidnaps one of the English General's two daughters while the General, the fiancé of one of the daughters, and three men they come across - Uncas (the last of the Mohicans), his Father Chingachook and the white Scout who is called "Long Rifle." The story consists mainly of this group saving the girls, then the girls getting captured again, then they save them again, and they are re-captured... all the while we are lectured on the surroundings and the trees and the moss, and the leaves... it is very verbose and tedious, and interrupts what should have been the more interesting parts of the book.

The characters are very weak, with almost no definition and the dialogue is atrocious. In all what should have been a very exciting romp through the North American wilderness is hindered by the execution of the story. There is perhaps a lot of background that I missed by not reading the rest of the “Leather Stalking Tales,” but after reading this, I am not sure that I would be able to sit through much more of Cooper’s style. It was frustrating because I wanted so badly to love this book. Unfortunately I ended up rather ambivalent to it all and will be forced to mark it as simply “Okay.” Though I am glad that I read this, I really don’t think I would recommend it to anyone other than those like myself who are determined to read through most of the Classics.

Man in the Iron Mask - Alexander Dumas

2008-11-05T10:00:00.000-05:00

This is the third and final book of the Musketeers Trilogy. Unfortunately I did not read the second book in the series so that may have tempered my comprehension of all of the events as they unfolded in this epic tale. Here is the first warning – this is NOT the movie… nowhere close, so if you are looking for that story, it’s not here. Second, the language in this can get a bit tedious, particularly the names, as everyone is called by different names though out the book (their musketeer name, their title, their real name, other names, etc) this makes it a bit hard to follow if you don’t catch on right from the beginning who is who and what all they may be called. Third warning – this is not a happy book, this is the final act of the musketeer saga, and when I say final, I mean it.

The story itself is very involving, especially if you already know and love our Musketeers. Aramis has a plan that involves swapping out the current king on the throne for his twin brother… his plans do not go well for him and the rest of the book involves the aftermath of this failed plot. As Aramis and Porthos run from the now very angry king, d’Artagnan struggles in his relationship with his friends and the king he now serves as the head of the Musketeers. Meanwhile Athos is suffering from his son – Raoul’s decision to run from the pain he feels over love lost, and join the army fighting in Africa.

Our four musketeers are getting on in the years, as are their servants. They are no longer the leap into battle, brash youths of the previous novels. They have grown and are now calculating, loyal, and honorable, their friendships are tested and their loyalty to the crown and country is put on the line. There is a tremendous amount of pain in this book, and death is around every corner. I won’t say that this was a favorite of mine, even though people love the ending and say that they cried when they read it. I sort of felt let down, that the musketeers should go out on such a huge failure (the man in the iron mask– only sits on the throne for an evening, then we never hear from him again, he is in no way a major character, he is only a catalyst for future events.) Though they fought bravely, I would really have liked for them to have truly won their last endeavor together.

In all I am glad I read this book, but was often frustrated by the episodic nature of the writing which at times made if very hard to follow. I also was a bit disappointed in the amount of time spent on characters that seemed to have little purpose to the forward progression of the story. In the end, I would have to say… I liked the movie better, it was just more fun and really felt like the musketeers that I knew and loved rather than the individuals who were in this book. Only Porthos truly retained his nature from the first several books. Still, I would advise any lover of literature to give this book a chance. Perhaps a different translation would be better advised than this one.

The Stepford Wives - Ira Levin

2008-11-01T20:31:00.001-04:00

I can handle watching or reading just about any level of horror... so what was it about this tiny little novella that I read in an hour that truly chilled me? First, I have never seen the movies... so I had no real preconceived notions other than having seen the commercials. Something about being a girl, who was raised in a society where everything tells you that you have to be beautiful, you have to be talented, and above all you have to be perfect or you are nothing... this book really taps into that mantra. The feeling that every little girl has that "I'm not good enough" most of us (hopefully) follow that up with "but at least I'm ME" and that is where the terror of this book lies.

What if the ultimate deceiver, the true villain is the one person who should love you the most, your protector, your partner, your husband. What if he would change you... take away your identity for his own pleasure... and what if everyone was on his side. How would you hold on, how could you escape?

As you can tell this book really hit a nerve with me... true I was born in 1978, so this was a little before my time, but it hasn't changed all that much even though we want to think so. The book is really about men's desires, or Levin's interpretation of them. That they would be willing to sacrifice their wife's very identity, her being, to make her a mindless barbie that did what they pleased. The men in this book are truly horrifying beings... but even more frightening is that this is a doubt shared by all women, across the globe. From a young age we are taught to doubt ourselves, our physical appearance, our mind, our talent, the love of others. I know women with genius IQ's who act like idiots because that is what men want from them. Though there is no magical overnight drug that can do this to a woman... there is the lifelong barrage of the media and society which does a pretty good job in and of itself.

Off my soapbox now. This book freaked me out... it was very well written, very tight and compact, and rediculously short for the price. I would advise getting it from a library, a used book store, or a friend rather than spending the cover amount on it. Mainly because it is so short. Still, I think this book has a lot of meaning, this book should be read and discussed with others... and to the ladies out there... odds are you will end up a bit unsettled and a bit angry at the end of it all.

Morbid Curiosity - Deborah LeBlanc

2008-11-01T20:29:00.001-04:00

Leblanc has a knack for writing horror that is accessible to both the young and old. In Morbid Curiosity she once again creates real characters who the reader can really hold on to. The ride is a fun one, and as always her use of the language is interestingly simplistic yet beautiful.

Short Summary: A set of twins, Haley and Heather, have had a bad year... their father passed away and their mother mentally shut down after his death. They have been sent to live with their grandparents and now have to not only adjust to the death of their father and mother's new insanity, but also a new school, new friends, and an entirely new lifestyle with their Grandparents. When the popular girl in school asks them to hang out with her they gladly accept... when she starts talking about Chaos Magic and what it can do to change your life, they are interested. But soon Heather is afraid that they may be in over their head and Haley is not behaving the way she normally would.

If you (like me) hate snakes, be forewarned... they are in this book by the hundreds... creepy crawly things that send shivers up my spine. The simplistic writing style that Leblanc uses makes this an easy book to fly right through. The characters are fairly well defined, though I would have liked to have felt more from the twins on the recent loss of their parents, that aspect felt rather brushed over. Mark, their art teacher, who is the first to consider that something may be going on... reacts rather strangely to the whole affair. It was rather odd to me that he immediately believed in the power of Chaos magic, rather than just worrying that the girls were into some cultish behavior that might lead them down the wrong path. And I was a little surprised that he never "called home" to discuss his fear that the girls were "in a cult."

I also would have liked a little more info on our bad guy... his transition from the opening scene to the final scene would have been and interesting trek to follow. Unfortunately I can't place together how the one became the other. I have some guesses but nothing in the book supports them as either right or wrong.

Who is this book for? I would say for the 12 and up crew (maybe older depending on reading level) there is a bit of lust, but it isn't overt or overly graphic. There is no sex, and I don't recall any over the top profanity. As far as violence, there is some (it's a horror novel after all) but I didn't find it gory. Probable movie rating would be PG-13. Also this novel follows along with LeBlanc's "the good guys and bad guys all get what they deserve in the end" leading to slightly Hollywood-esque endings. Still this is a fun and light read, if you are looking for something that won't strain your mind, and will entertain without grossing you out, give this book a try.

The Yellow Wallpaper - Charlotte Perkins Gilman

2008-11-01T20:27:00.000-04:00

I actually read this for free online... it took me about 25 minutes to read the whole story so I'm glad I didn't spend any money on it. But I AM glad that I read it. This is a strange little short story from the viewpoint of a woman who has recently given birth and suffers from post-partum depression. The cure for this at the time was strict bed rest with little to no mental stimulation. Our poor protagonist is married to a physician who believes that she needs to spend as much time as possible resting.

Because women were considered weak and incapable of handling too much thinking, the diagnosis is to prevent them from thinking. This was used to cure anxiety and depression... but anyone who has ever been forced into bedrest knows that all you do when laying there is think... and your thoughts get a little screwy after you've stared at the ceiling counting the dots. So is our heroine loosing her mind or is that horrible wall paper actually changing, showing her things, is there a woman behind bars trying to escape? Or is she projecting her misery with her confinement, her husband, and her situation into the frayed and torn wallpaper.

This was really a fun read that I could envision people having hours and hours of discussion on. It's one of those little bits of writing that you can easily gloss over and not think of again... but if you pull back that first layer you'll discover that there is so much more to this tiny little tale. I highly recommend taking the 20 minutes it will take you to read this, specifically to women and people in the medical profession... the insanity of what the medical profession used to believe is unbelievable.

A Modest Proposal - Jonathan Swift

2008-11-01T20:26:00.000-04:00

Swift truly is the father of modern satire, unfortunately true satire is a dying art form. "A Modest Proposal" is one of the most brilliant papers ever written. A biting idea proposed on handling the issues of poverty and overpopulation in Ireland.

The infamous proposal is the fattening, and eating of the children of the poor. Swift goes into great detail proving that his theory would work. Is he truly proposing that the English dine on "yearlings" as he calls them? Of course not... but he is showing that just because an option is available and COULD solve an issue, doesn't mean that people can stomach the ethics involved.

This should be MANDATORY reading in all schools... if nothing else perhaps the next generation will realize the importance and the power of satire.

The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas

2008-11-01T20:25:00.000-04:00

I have put off reading this book for years... mainly because of its size, and the fact that it was written in French, and I just didn't want to put that much work into anything. I finally convinced myself that I really needed to read this because I enjoy the movies so much.

In the beginning... I was worried. The language was easy enough to follow (concern number 1 gone) but the writing style seemed a bit loose and haphazard. Rather than my mind being boggled, I found myself getting irritated by the wandering I felt that the book was doing. For the first quarter of the book I had started to question my choice of reading this. At first D'Artagnan irritated me because he seemed so stupid, and ready to fight anyone and everyone over anything, then our introduction to the three musketeers Athos, Aramis and Porthos were also ready to "cross swords" with anyone at even the most minor offence. The first several sword fights were rather sparse as far as description and excitement so it didn't "thrill" me the way I had hoped.

Enter the Cardinal, he was interesting... devious and maniacal... I thought to myself that the book could be picking up. But sadly the first half of the book really was nothing but D'Artagnan pining over women, and the Musketeers drinking, eating or spending money on more equipment. I was a bit weirded out by their lackeys... each of them had a servant who was all but a slave. These servants were only mentioned when they were being scolded, or offered up to do their master's bidding.

The story began to get interesting with the introduction of Milady, one of the most intelligent and evil villainesses I have encountered in a book. Vile of nature and black of heart she is a truly evil being that really spices up the book. Once she was brought into the picture, the tedious story opened up into an interesting tale of intrigue, a battle of wits between her, the cardinal and the musketeers.

There is a fair amount of history in this book, however much of it has been altered with creative license so I wouldn't take the events as gospel. I guess I can see why this is a classic, however I would have to say I preferred "The Count of Monte Cristo" to this. Had the first half been more entertaining I would have really loved this book. I'm just glad I kept reading so that I could get to the interesting part.

An American Haunting: The Bell Witch - Brent Monahan

2008-11-01T20:23:00.000-04:00

I am not all that familiar with the Jersey Devil legend... other legends have always taken the forefront in my research and reading. But I am aware of the Jersey Devil who haunts the Pine Barrens. Dunbar's novel "The Pines" takes the old tale and adds a new spin on it. The concept is interesting, engaging and filled with quite a few victims who end up all but inside out.

The Short Summary: We follow Athena, Steve, Doris, Matty, and just about everyone else who lives in a small town as people start dying in the woods. The main characters are the operators of the beat up ambulance and the police. Of course there are quite a few other locals... they bicker, fight, and eventually try to figure out what is killing all of these people in such violent ways.

So there is woods, a monster, inbred people, and lots of others for the monster to eat... why am I not raving about this book and demanding that you go buy it? The presentation. Much of this book is written in dialogue, which I never thought I would have an issue with... but we meet characters when they start speaking and they are very rarely described. Often many people will be talking for quite some time before they are named, then you have to go back and re-read the conversation to put it into context. Apart from what you pick up in the conversations and the characters' internal dialogue... very little of the story is explained. The characters all have very similar speech patterns, opinions, and attitudes which makes it even harder to pick out who is talking until they are named. Also they react in their speaking to things we aren't told are going on. It felt very much like I was back in theater class and reading a play with all of the blocking left out.

In the end, I really didn't find myself connecting with any of the characters, and with the frustration of always trying to figure out who was saying what and the constant switching back and forth from scene to scene as well as the large cast of people (though the total number wasn't all that high, the percentage of characters that added nothing to the forward progression of the story was very high), I had a difficult time convincing myself to read this one all the way to the end.

I know that the ending of this book was touted as brilliant, and it being "shocking" but to be honest... I wasn't all that shocked, I pretty much knew what was going on before the book was half way over. I know that there is a severe lack of horror material on the Jersey Devil... but I really didn't feel that as a horror book, this really stood up to some of the other options that are out there for readers to consume. I won't say that I hated it... but I just really didn't enjoy the style, which is sad because I thought the idea really had merit.

The Pines - Robert Dunbar

2008-11-01T20:22:00.000-04:00

Lowlife Underdogs - Dustin LaValley

2008-11-01T20:21:00.000-04:00

Lowlife Underdogs is a short story book in the strictest sense of the word. Many of these stories are one page, with some only being a paragraph long. There are a total of 32 stories the longest being the title story which is the last in the book coming in at 23 pages long. With there being no Author information in the book, I couldn't gauge the age of the author, though I would guess at between 18-23 based off of what I read. The stories in this book are short, and very familiar, it is easy to guess where they are going to end up almost from the first couple of sentences. The writing style and tone is reminiscent of something that a depressed emo would write while spending a month in the local inpatient "happy house." There are several stories about suicide, murder, and difficulty having children. If the writer is actually very young, then we have a lot to look forward to, because the actual writing is very good. My main complaint is that the execution in each of the stories actually undoes the terror that they should induce. Also most of these stories are tales we've heard before, either urban legends, or scenes we've all viewed in various "B" horror movies. I'm not sure if they were meant to be tributes, but if we all know what is going to happen, then they cease to have the ability to shock and horrify.

This book would be most highly entertaining for the 15-18 year old group, 12 and up would enjoy it, but the language and sexual matter is far to harsh for me to suggest handing it over to a 12 year old.
Contains: Murder, Suicide, Violence, Profanity, Sex, Low level Gore (predominantly aftermath).

Covenant - John Everson

2008-09-16T09:11:00.001-04:00

So you are a reporter who has already committed career suicide once, now you find yourself working at the local paper in the sleepy little town of Terrel. Bored to tears from covering garden parties, you finally catch wind of something interesting… a teen leaps to his death from the cliffs overlooking the town. When you ask a few questions you get very strange responses from the townspeople so you do a little investigation… suddenly discovering a string of yearly suicides going back over 100 years. Convinced you have a story on your hands, you start to investigate, even though everyone in the town warns you against it… because sometimes secrets are kept for your own safety.

From what I understand this is Everson’s first novel, I personally have never read anything by Everson before but I like to try new things, so I dug right in. The book itself is just under 300 pages with a teaser of his next novel at the back. This book is a very quick read that I started about 8pm and finished before 11 that night. The story is an interesting one, as the reader you know something is going on, and you are able to figure it out more quickly than our dear reporter, Joe Keirnan… just in time that you’ll know when he’s about to make a serious error. But who can he trust when everyone is hiding something. This book has a very supernatural edge to it, and though the grand finale felt that it should have had a few more bodies racked up… it was a satisfying conclusion. This book is not as gory as most that I have read, though there are several supernaturally induced rape scenes which may be upsetting to more sensitive readers.

The setup for the ending is fairly clear to guess from early on in the book, which takes out any chance of a “shocker” ending, but it really didn’t bother me all that much. The book was well written and managed to keep my attention from beginning to end. Though I always felt that I knew what was about to happened, it never really irritated me as it does with some books. Some of the characters could have used a little more meat to them, had he thrown in another 30 pages or so I feel the book could have been even better. The tale unfolds similar to a haunted house story, with the haunted house being a cliff instead of a house. I would have liked for a higher creepiness level, I never really had the vibe that the characters were truly in that much danger because it just felt like they were going to make it from the moment you met them. “Covenant,” though highly entertaining, and well worth the read to a horror fan, does not really break any new ground. I would be happy to read a second book about the incidents 100 years before, I feel that he had a very interesting tale there and actually the little blurbs from the journal were probably my favorite part of the book.

Recommended to fans of the general horror genre (King and Koontz), I’m not sure that the extreme horror crew (Laymon, Ketchum, Lee) will find as much gore here as they would like. In all this is a very tightly written novel with excellent pacing, and fairly descent characters for a horror tale. I consider this to be a wonderful first novel and hope that the author has many more in store for us.

Dracula's Guest - Bram Stoker

2008-09-16T09:09:00.001-04:00

I had never heard of this book before, but when I ran across it and saw who the author was, I snatched it up and started reading. What we have here is a series of short stories published by Mrs. Stoker after the passing of her husband. The stories range from the disturbing supernatural tale of “The Judge” to the vampiric title tale of “Dracula’s Guest” some versions of this book include the “Lair of the White Worm” which although it is not one of my favorite of Mr. Stoker’s Cannon, it is still a very creepy and disturbing novella.

This is a VERY short read, and can be completed in a day without trouble. As with all short story collections some will be more to your taste than others. None really packed the punch of “Dracula” but then few tales do. My personal favorites were “Dracula’s Guest” in which a British fellow fails to head the warning of the locals and ventures into a hellish evening of wolves and the supernatural… and we are left with the feeling that his next venture may prove even worse for him.

“The Judge” was also interesting… though I really would have liked for there to be more to this story. A learned man takes up residence in the local haunted mansion to get some peace and quite while studying. He gets more than he bargained for in the end. This was a very interesting and dark tale with “Twilight Zone” or “Tales from the Crypt” written all over it. It is very cinematic in tone and could have been much longer.

In all there are tales of vengeance, redemption, the supernatural, pacts with the Devil, angry black cats, beggars run amok, murderers, insanity… if you love the short stories of Edgar Allen Poe, then you really need to pick up this collection. If you have read and re-read Dracula and can’t get enough, then pick up this book… it’s hard to find (my copy came from a used bookstore and it looked like a dog had gone to town on the cover) but it is well worth the hunt.

Charnel House – Graham Masterton

2008-09-11T14:44:00.000-04:00

I just finished skimming the other reviews and I don’t know if I read a different version of the book or what, but I know that what I read wasn’t the same thing as what is mentioned in some of the other reviews out on the internet. First – there is no private investigator; and second - the baddie is not a shaman or witch doctor and it certainly isn’t out to “get back at the white people.” Granted I read the older printing of the book, with the really bad cover art… so maybe the newer version was highly edited.

Quick Summary – an elderly man comes to the city sanitation department because his house is breathing, he’s been everywhere else and no-one can or will help him. Out of curiosity more than the intention to fix anything John Hyatt (the city sanitation worker – NOT a P.I.) takes a co-worker to the house to see if maybe it is a rodent problem. The infestation turns out to be much more than rodents as Native American Mythology takes a for-runner in this story. People start getting injured in strange ways as the group of “believers” who hope to do something about it grows to a Sanitation worker, a book seller, a Doctor and a Shaman/Witch Doctor, can they combat the ancient Native American evil before it destroys mankind?

Now for the review, as with all of Masterton’s books that I have read so far, the opening is VERY good. Creepy, chilling, the haunted “breathing” house is fun and positively frightening. The problem is that the house isn’t where we spend most of our time. As characters are added it seems that they are too quick to believe in the far-fetched and too willing to do something about it. All but one character that the “explanation” of the goings on was explained to almost immediately said – “Okay, I’m coming to help.” I know that this was one of his earlier works, and that he really hadn’t hit his writing stride yet, but it was still fun. And it is short (under 250 pgs), so if you don’t like it… you can finish it quickly and move on to something else.

My biggest complaint is that the second half of the book (away from the house) became WAY to far fetched for my brain to buy into. If the baddie was what they explained it to be… we never saw the carnage, we never saw its capabilities, and it wasn’t nearly as bright as they let on. There was a lot of talk and build up to something that really didn’t do what they expected. As far as I can tell the body count was about 7-8 (I’m not sure if the one guy made it or not) which isn’t very high for the build up of – “It’ll destroy mankind.” All in all, this was one of Masterton’s weaker novels, but still worth the read if you are bored. I would suggest borrowing it though rather than paying for it.

Carpe Jugulum – Terry Pratchett

2008-09-11T14:40:00.000-04:00

The reviews here are quite varied on this book, they are all obviously written by Pratchett fans however one of the problems with being a Pratchett fan is that he has SO many novels that you are bound to find a few that aren’t your taste. I personally loved this book. My favorite of Pratchett’s creations include the Witches and the Guards series.

An attempt at a short summary:
The King of Lancre and his new wife the former Witch Margrat have their first child, and are holding the Christening ceremony. In The King’s usual attempt to be “Modern” he invites the Magpyrs, a family of Vampires from Uberwald. Vampires of course cannot go where not invited, so they capitalize on the invitation to take over the entire country of Lancre. The Vampire clan however, is obsessed with becoming “Modern” and is quite Yuppyish. They have made themselves immune to garlic, sunlight, religious symbols, and just about everything else that normally works against Vampires. Meanwhile Granny Weatherwax’s invitation to the Christening was stolen, so in a typical Granny fashion, she is off in a huff. The soppy priest of Om that comes to do the Christening becomes quite the major character, and the “Wee Free Men” make their first appearance. Add in Igor, the Vampire’s henchman who wishes things would go back to the way they are, and the Falconer who spends most of the tale hunting down a Phoenix and you’re in for a non-stop good time. Nanny Ogg and Agnes/Perditia Nitt are put into the position of attempting to rescue the kingdom from the Vampires without Granny.

The witches are all their standard unique selves, Granny stubborn as a mule but with a heart of gold, Nanny with her wild ways and lewd comments, Margrat with her new aged ideas but strong backbone when needed, and the newest of the coven – Agnes Nitt a very big girl with a thin girl trapped inside her. Agnes becomes a major character in this book and really develops her unique personalities. The Priest of Om also becomes quite an interesting character with his on again off again faith crisis. The Wee Free Men are entertaining, but hard to read, Igor is an absolute trip.

Some will say that this is a re-write of “Lords and Ladies” I personally didn’t find it so. Sure bad guys arrive and threaten Lancre, and the Witches step up to do battle in their round-about humorous ways. But then again what fantasy/sci-fi/action or horror doesn’t have bad guys showing up and good guys trying to stop them? Of Pratchett’s novels I found this one to be much darker than the others because the Vampires are quite sinister for one of his villains. Still I found this to be an amazingly humorous tale. The bickering between the witches, the family fights between the vampires, Igor’s wanting to make everything dusty and covered in spider webs and longing for the old-school days of his master, the Falconer’s obsession with trying to catch a bird he’s never seen, the Wee Free Men stealing anything they can get their hands on, and even Greebo.

The pace of the book is unbelievably quick, numerous characters come and go and you’ll find yourself wondering how all of this will tie in together. But you can’t put it down. I can attest to that first hand, I read way past my bedtime to finish the book because the action never stopped long enough for me to stick in a bookmark. The humor wasn’t as non-stop as in some of his other books, but the funny parts were hysterical. I found that this book had far more meaning to it than many of the others.

If you are first time Pratchett reader, I would not recommend this book as a starting place because some of the history of the witches is almost required to get full enjoyment out of this story. I can’t imagine that a first time reader would understand the concept of “Borrowing” from this book or get the humor of the “I ain’t dead” sign. This is one of my favorite of Pratchett’s novels so far.

Books of Blood Volume 1 – Clive Barker

2008-09-11T14:36:00.001-04:00

This was my first venture into the world of Barker’s short stories, and although I was very excited to read the book, I found that it was as many short story books are, hit and miss.

The book opens with a story titled “The Book of Blood” which I suppose would be an intro, though it is almost a short story in itself. It is a good intro, drawing the reader in lots of ghosties, a haunted house, paranormal phenomenon and lots of blood. Excellent intro to amp up the reader and get them ready to dive right through the book. I’d give this short 4 of 5 stars.

The first story is “Midnight Meat Train.” I wasn’t overly impressed with the title but what the heck, it was a good story. A serial killed of the most disgusting kind, an unwitting accountant who finds his way into that serial killers world, and then bam, strangeness abounds as the supernatural makes its appearance. Excellent story again, 4 of 5 stars.

The second is “The Yattering and Jack.” I would in no way call this a horror story… it’s closer to something you would find in a Christopher Moore book, in fact I think he based the entire book “Practical Demonkeeping” off of reading this short. This story was a humorous tale of a lesser Demon sent to torment a man to insanity… the problem is that the man just doesn’t seem to care about anything the Demon does… including exploding a few household pets. I found myself giggling through this story. I don’t felt that it fit all that well with the rest of the book, but it was highly entertaining. 4 of 5 stars.

Third you have “Pig Blood Blues” if I recall the title correctly. This one was strange, but predictable. An ex-cop goes to work at a school for delinquent boys and finds himself mixed up in a strange sacrificial mess. The story seemed familiar, sort of like the Wickerman meets “Children of the Corn.” I can’t say that it was my favorite, but every short story book has at least one mediocre story in it. 3 of 5 stars.

Fourth is “Sex, Death, and Starshine” and interesting story about the life and death of Theater. Sex, murder and ghosts abound in this story. I think Dionysus would be pleased. Though this may have been the longest story in the book, I enjoyed it. I like ghosts and the theater, and I was very happy that it didn’t turn out to be another “Phantom of the Opera” which is what I was concerned with in the beginning. Though at times the story drug a bit, I think this was probably my favorite. 4 of 5 stars

The final story “In the Hills, The Cities” was completely bizarre. I can’t even begin to explain it because I couldn’t for the life of me comprehend it. I didn’t find it frightening, or even disgusting… just perplexing. Two gay guys go out into the middle of nowhere and find… um… two cities? I tried with all of my might to picture what was being described in my mind… but it just wouldn’t go together. I felt this story was by far the weakest in the book and a sadly pitiful note to end on. 2 of 5 stars.

All in all, I would say this is a 4 star book, the majority of which is very entertaining to read. I think the only scary stories in it were “The Book of Blood” and “Midnight Meat Train” but the others were good for what they were, except for the finale which was very disappointing.

Bloodstone – Nate Kenyon

2008-09-11T14:35:00.000-04:00

It’s been a long time since I’ve read a horror story like this one. Most horror novelists are either very good at openings but then the rest of the tale doesn’t hold up, or they are excellent a mood but the characters are week, or sometimes you get the occasional author who struggles in the beginning but if you can make it 50 pages or so into the book, it really gets rocking and rolling. For a debut novel, I am unbelievably impressed by the even-ness of the entire book. We start out creepy, and the level of creepiness remains from beginning to end. We have multidimensional characters that we care about, and an intriguing plot that includes both present day and also letters from over a hundred years ago. Honestly I found the letters to be very intriguing and would like to read more on that particular tale.

Short Summary: We open with Bill Smith having kidnapped “Angel” a junkie and prostitute, he is being plagued by dreams of the undead coming after him and seems to be drawn to a place he has never been. Angel is also having the dreams and has been hiding behind her addiction to keep them at bay. The two finally end up in a small town in Maine (why is it always Maine?) where they feel that something dark and sinister is about to occur and somehow they have a part to play. Meanwhile, Jeb Taylor’s homicidal father has passed away in prison and Jeb collects his father’s belongings, among which include some very strange and ancient artifacts. Jeb’s behavior soon begins changing and horrific dreams begin to plague his mind as well.

I found this to be one of the most well thought out “first novels” I’ve read in a long time. I truly enjoyed the read. It is fairly fast paced and as I mentioned earlier, the level of “creepy” begins right off the bat and remains with you from beginning to end. True there are a lot of unexplained things in this book, but sometimes that just adds to the terror. Many people have compared him to an “Early Stephen King” and I can see the similarities, though I actually preferred this novel to the “More recent Stephen King novels.” On the whole this was a very fun read and I look forward to more books by Mr. Kenyon.

Basket Case – Carl Hiaasen

2008-09-11T14:33:00.000-04:00

Other than “Team Rodent” I had never read a Hiaasen novel until this one. I had always heard good things and had listened to him compared to many of my favorite authors. Last night I read Basket Case (actually I finished it… I started it yesterday). Now that I have finally read a Hiaasen novel, I must say, I absolutely loved it.

First, it takes place in my home state of Florida, which I miss immensely so it was nice to be back there, if only in my mind. Second, Hiaasen is an extremely intelligent writer, I have read many “Humorous” books that border on insulting in the implausibility department when it comes to straining for a laugh. Hiaasen never crosses that line. The story is first and foremost and the writing style is smart, witty, and simple to read. You never have to go back and re-read a line to figure out what he was saying, and you are also never insulted by the childishness.

The characters are interesting, funny, charming, likeable, quirky and most of all, extremely human. I never doubted these people, heck I think I’ve met them before. The plot is interesting and plays out like a mystery… you find yourself really rooting for our leading man Jack Tagger. The book follows Jack, a once rising star in the newspaper world who shot off his mouth at the wrong time and was reassigned to the demeaning world of obituary writing. He now suffers from neurosis that come with the job… an obsession with death, mainly his own and how old he’ll be when it happens. Up until now it has destroyed relationships and forced his career to dwindle to almost negligible. Then he covers the death of Jimmy Stoma, ex rocker and musical bad boy. Very quickly he decides that there is something strange about the death and the old reporter in him stirs…. And begins stirring up trouble.

The rest of cast of characters includes:
Emma - Jack’s editor and possible love/hate interest
Juan the Cuban Sportswriter and Jack’s best friend
Cleo – the dead rocker’s wife and aspiring pop diva
Janet – the dead rocker’s sister and arch enemy of Cleo
Carla – Jack’s ex-girlfriend’s daughter and club scene master

The crew gets even larger and more interesting… Colonel Tom is by far my favorite scene in the book, but I won’t go into detail, you just have to read that one for yourself. In the end the book is darkly funny, engaging, and fairly high speed entertainment toward the end when everything starts hitting the fan. I know Tim Dorsey is often compared with Hiaasen, but in reality there is no comparison other than the setting of their books. Dorsey is extremely over the top while Hiaasen is firmly grounded in reality… albeit a strange and demented reality, but a believable one none-the-less. I would compare him more with Vonnegut (minus the sci-fi aspect) than Dorsey, Pratchett or Gaiman.

Baal – Robert McCammon

2008-09-11T14:32:00.000-04:00

I read this book in an evening; it’s a fairly quick read if you don’t lose interest. I had no problem with it, but I can see where others had issues with it. This was McCammon’s first book, so it is by no means his best. The story of Baal (a daemon or demigod of evil) who is born from a raped woman and manages to gather together a frenzied following of believers. The “good guys” we follow include a theology professor, a half Eskimo hunter and the mysterious “Michael” in their quest to end Baal’s influence.

The book is well written, though from the beginning I feared I was reading an “Omen” rip off. Then we changed settings and drifted away from the “Omen” plot and moved on to other plots we have seen before. The problem with this story versus so many other of McCammon’s is that there really isn’t anything here that we haven’t seen before. Granted it’s brilliantly written, but it’s a rehash and remixing of all of the other antichrist movies and books.

As a McCammon fan, you will probably be a bit disappointed since, as I previously stated this was his first book and therefore not as polished or mind bogglingly genius as his following novels, however even his first book is far superior to many of the others on the shelves for purchase. I did enjoy reading this, the Eskimos were a nice touch… but he could have gone much farther than he did. Still I will give it 4 stars because even though it’s not his best, it’s better than most of the garbage that is published.

A Winter Haunting – Dan Simmons

2008-09-11T14:30:00.000-04:00

This is my second Simmons novel, and I must say that he is fast becoming one of my favorite writers. I read this book without knowing that “Summer of Night” came before it… which is sad because I bought them both together an am now apparently reading them out of order. Never the less, I had no trouble following the story without having read the preceding novel. I think having read it would have filled me in a bit on some of the information that the sheriff seems to randomly blurt out toward the end of the novel, but it didn’t really bother me.

Dale is an interesting character; pitiful, deplorable at times, yet not so appalling as to make him hard to root for. After destroying his life and his relationships through bad choice after bad choice, a failed suicide attempt sends him back to his childhood to try to write a novel while sorting through his past. Dale drifts in and out of possible madness, as the reader you are never sure… is he being haunted by ghosts? His past? Or simply madness? Is he loosing his mind or are there hell hounds growing and growling in the night outside of his childhood friend’s house. The tragic death of his childhood friend has scarred him, though we are never sure how deeply. Is Dale writing notes to himself or communicating with his long dead childhood friend Duane?

Most of the complaints about the “slow pace” of the book come from the flashbacks Dale has of his life with Claire. Clair is not a very likeable person and we know that Dale has thrown his marriage away to be with her, and of course… it ended badly between them. Also we have chapters from the perspective of a spirit we assume to be Duane, watching Dale and telling us a bit of what he sees from the outside. The spirit chapters bothered me a bit; particularly at the end when I wondered why, if the spirit was so eloquent was it so cryptic in it’s warnings to him. Perhaps it knew that Dale must traverse this path whether it wanted him to or not.

Dale’s choice to live in his dead friend’s farmhouse is a strange one, and when it seems that the reader has figured out what is going on, the twists guide you into a new direction. I went through a range of guesses hoping always to be wrong. For the most part I was, and I am glad for it. I like to be surprised by a novel. Though I didn’t find the book to be “Hair Raising” or “Spine tingling” I did find it to be a wonderfully enjoyable read. Well written and perplexing without being confusing. You find yourself just as baffled by events as Dale and hoping that he finds a way to survive either the madness or the haunting. 4.5 out of 5 stars… excellent read!

Around the World in 80 Days – Jules Verne

2008-09-11T14:28:00.000-04:00

There is something to be said about the writing of Jules Verne… he is direct, concise and minimalist which seems so opposite of the stories he is writing, which are always huge fantastic tales. Though many of his novels are more Science Fiction, this is simply an Adventure novel. The problem with reading this novel now, is that it is very difficult to go into it without having seen one of the many movies that were made from the book. I believe that by the time I read this, I had seen almost every movie ever made on it (include the newest “Jackie Chan” version which my kids love). That being said… even though the movies and the book are very different, the ending is still the same, which detracts a bit from the reading of the book. I would have loved to have read this back in the time when it was written, I am sure that the little boys and girls laying in their beds reading this were exhilarated by the ending, and then spent many an hour planning their own trip around the world. Something in Verne’s writing does that… it opens up your belief that somewhere out there is a grand adventure waiting for you.

This tale is told mainly from the perspective of Passepartout, the manservant of Phileas Fogg. Fogg is and has always been a punctual man whose life is run like clockwork. Each second of the day is structured, pre-planned and no great adventure ever befalls Mr. Fogg. Passapartout, a Frenchman looking for a new start on life is very excited to find such a calm, respectable, and orderly man to work for. Unfortunately on his very first day on the job, Fogg makes a strange bet. Fogg bets his friends that it is indeed possible to round the world in 80 days. After much arguing, they take the bet, half of Fogg’s fortune is at stake. When he returns home, Fogg informs Passepartout of their mission and they begin to pack. Meanwhile, the Bank has been robbed of 50k pounds (a huge amount back then) and Inspector Fix is on the case… hearing about Fogg’s plan to circle the globe, he assumes that he is the thief and is using the bet to run from the law.

Heading Eastward, Fogg and Passepartout travel by train, ship and elephant, with Fix always on their trail. The descriptions of the places they travel through are very minimalist, and the reader learns very little about the different cities and countries they cross. Since the travelers spend most of the time on trains or ships there is very little description, and much more on the planning and tracking of their trip. The most descriptive and interesting part of the story for me was the part where they were forced to take an elephant to continue the journey. Because they were then outside and traveling more slowly there was some additional detail and the action increased.

On the whole this is a brilliantly thought out book, though I don’t consider it one of Verne’s best. I only say that because I found that people riding on a boat or a train are not particularly exciting. There was never the sense of danger that “Journey to the Center of the Earth” or some of his others contained. Still it was a very fun and quick read. I highly recommend it to the 13 and up crew. Much younger than that and I believe they would enjoy having it read to them, because due to the differences in the world back then versus now, I feel that it would require some discussion for true appreciation. On the whole I think everyone should sit down at some point and read this book, along with many of his others.

Practical Demonkeeping - Christopher Moore

2008-09-11T14:25:00.000-04:00

Christopher Moore’s Practical Demonkeeping

This novel was a surprisingly quick read, it is short and although not action packed, it manages to keep your attention from beginning to end. The writing style is very casual and humorous, slightly vulgar but not so much as to gain an “R” rating or to turn off the casual reader. There are drugs, but they are not glorified, there is sex, but it is not explicit and there is profanity, but it is not overwhelming.

The story itself is simple enough, one man (Travis) is cursed with being the “Master” of a Demon by the name of Catch, who is not entirely under his control and tends to eat people when he so chooses. Augustus Brine, the small town owner of a bait, tackle, and fine wine shop is suddenly visited by the king of the Djinn who charges him with finding the Demonkeeper and sending Catch back to where ever it is that the Demon naturally inhabits. The story follows not only Travis and Augustus, but also most of the small town of Pine Cove. Although this is a short book, you will find yourself introduced to more characters than seems possible, and wonder how on Earth this litany of characters will intertwine and affect the story by the end of it all. In this Moore does a fantastic job of never spending too much time on the characters that go nowhere, and managing to include everyone in the ending.

As I stated before, this is a quick and easy read, my only complaint is that in order to get to the resolution, Moore does break down into a long and over involved exposition by one of the characters (Travis) that I felt could have been either broken up better through the story, or told a bit more naturally. In the end the resolution makes the story work and certainly doesn’t let the reader down. The journey is a fun one and you have the opportunity to meet several very real characters along the way. No one is perfect, and no one is truly evil. In all it is a very human experience told through a very supernatural tale.

The Hidden – Sarah Pinborough

2008-09-11T14:23:00.000-04:00

So much going on, so few pages to lash it all together! We have a woman who wakes up with amnesia and a new lease on life, a string of gruesome homicides, and a Detective trying to piece it all together. How does it all fit? Some Demonic ritual? Possession? Or something even more horrifying?

From what I understand, this was Pinborough’s first novel, and it is a very good book, though not as polished as her later attempts. This story for some reason reminded me a lot of “Hellbound Heart” by Barker, though the pick at your brain social commentary isn’t included in Pinborough’s novel. There is a decent amount of gore in this book, however most of it is the aftermath of the actual occurrence so it is not as gory as it could have been. For those of you who read horror novels for the nakedness, there is a touch of that, though it is not explicit.

What makes this book weaker than her following novels is the use of what feel like “cheap” tactics to get the point across. First we have the Diary that pretty much tells the Detective all the background he needs, then we have the psychic/medium who can explain the rest, and we have the Detective’s dead wife speaking through the medium to fill us in on everything else that we might have missed. It’s like a perfect storm of information to make sure that our mystery solver doesn’t miss any details. A second weakness in this book is the lack of time passing, at times it seems that only days have passed, then it is implied that months have gone by. In the end you can’t be sure if Mike and Rachel have been dating for two weeks or five months… and you can’t be sure if the murders are happening only days apart or months apart. In this book, Pinborough really hasn’t come into her own with the multidimensional characters yet. Most of them feel paper thin with little to no motivation for their actions. Still, with these weaknesses, this is a strong first novel and reading this you can see why the publisher signed her on for a few more.

This is a fairly quick read that is entertaining though doesn’t push the envelope in any fashion. If you are just looking for a fun night of mindless entertainment this is a great time waster, if you are in the mood to be truly frightened or have your mind expanded, then look elsewhere. There isn’t anything new in this novel and there really isn’t any deeper meaning behind what is going on in the story. Actually the diary, though it feels like a cheap tactic for the writer to have used, is one of the more interesting parts of the book. Elizabeth comes across as the only multi-dimensional character in this novel through the diary, even though we never really encounter her in the book as her true self.

A note to those of you who have read Pinborough’s other novels: most of her books read as very Americanized British horror, often times you forget that they even take place in Great Britain other than the occasional British slang that creeps in. This book is much more British all around, though not to the point where you question what is being said or get lost. (for example: I have NEVER understood the British term “Pull the other one” and no one has been able to explain what it means to me). On the whole this is a decent book that is worth the read if you don’t have anything else lying around. I wouldn’t go out of my way to buy it or track it down, but if you come across it, give it a whirl.

The Sirens of Titan - Kurt Vonnegut Jr.

2008-09-11T14:14:00.000-04:00

How does one even begin describing this book? Can you even sum up the plot and do it justice? Talk of Malachi and his adventures/mishaps or Beatrice… To we follow Roomford as he appears and disappears as the earth rotates? To we talk about the invasion from Mars? Or the years spent on Mercury? How to we discuss the plot when in reality the plot is only a vehicle to get the reader to the destination, the realization that Vonnegut is trying to make us come to. The best summary that I can come up with is that we follow Malachi/Unk through the end of his life… starting from his receiving a prediction that he would go to Mars, Mercury, back to Earth, and then to Titan… and ending at the end of his life and his journeys.

So what is this book even about? Well there’s religion, and the sense that God is not responsible for us, or our futures, rather we survive in a series of random accidents. Then there is the meaning of life, and the futility of the search for it. We have the satirical take on family, business, politics, and war. Then we have the long and involved satire of our purpose, and being used as humans toward a purpose that is both completely beyond our mental grasp, and not something that we would be happy to know about in the first place.

I personally cannot stand sci-fi so I put off reading this book for quite a while, even through I LOVE Vonnegut. In the end, the Sci-Fi aspect did not bother me because Vonnegut never spent all that much energy on that aspect. Sure they were on Mars, and Mercury, and Titan… and there was an alien life form or two and some spaceships… but as with the plot, the sci-fi aspect of this book is merely a vehicle to drive the reader to the proper conclusions. People are often upset that one cannot classify a Vonnegut book into any one genre; I find that this is because he is a philosopher who is wiling to take you to any extreme in order to open your eyes to what he views as reality. And what is Vonnegut’s reality? Simple – Life is a series of accidents, both good and bad. The Creator is off doing what he does best – Creating, not guiding our every movement and desire. And finally, that we shouldn’t put too much stock into our purpose, instead focus on just being nice, and being happy in the life that you have.

Even if you are not a fan of Sci-Fi I highly recommend this book. True it is not Vonnegut’s seminal work, nor is it his most humorous, but it has so many important themes running through it that it should be required reading in school. The number of discussions that can be had after reading and truly dissecting this book are amazing. The Simple line stated by Boaz on Mercury when he makes his decision, the true purpose of the Martian attack, the over all meaning of life. The ending of this book is a truly joyous, utterly ridiculous and yet so profoundly meaningful revelation that the reader cannot help but sit back and shake their head in both disbelief and astonishment, both appalled and amused, and most of all, completely unable to keep from wondering… is that what it really IS all about? Something so….. Now I don’t want to spoil it for you!

Though this book is only just over 300 pages, it took me longer than normal to read it, because you really don’t want to skim. The language is brilliant, and the satire is sometimes so deeply laced into what is being said that it can be easy to miss if you aren’t paying attention. As I said before, I highly recommend this book.